Investment Banks as Formula One Teams

Bored at work and just finished binging F1: drive to survive on Netflix.....

Soooo here goes:

Goldman Sachs/Scuderia Ferrari:The undisputed GOAT franchise. May not always be #1 in the league table/standings but has been consistently top-ranking for decades, not to mention the unparalleled prestige of making partner at GS/driving for Ferrari. Despised by other teams for their proximity to the governing body (Government Sachs/Ferrari International Assistance) and questionable favoritism.

J.P. Morgan/Mercedes:Old legacy brand which went dormant for decades (Morgan's commercial banking days/Mercedes' non-involvement in f1 until 2000s) that resurged in recent years (post-crisis/hybrid engine era) and proceeded to dominate the league tables/grid (JPM crushing league tables vs Mercedes winning 6 championships in a row) using their large balance sheets/R&D from Brawn GP.

Morgan Stanley/Red Bull: Equally powerful and rich as GS and JPM/Ferrari and Mercedes and once saw major success (dominant M&A franchise/4 world championships in a row)

BAML/Renault: Historically great franchise (Merrill Lynch/Benetton) that was bought out by a large universal bank/carmaker (BofA/Renault). Has seen successes via large balance sheets/virtually unlimited R&D budget but still has work to do in order to challenge the big boys.

Citi/McLaren: Wildly successful in the 80s (Salomon Bros/McLaren-Honda) but went quiet in the 90s before resurging in the 2000s as a completely new brand (Citigroup/McLaren-Mercedes) and saw some success before crashing down (financial crisis/failed partnership w/ Honda). Currently on the path upwards again with new leadership/power units.

DB/Williams: A once-dominant franchise now spiraling downwards with no end in sight due to gross mismanagement from the top (John Cryan/Claire Williams).

Barclays/Sauber: Former powerhouse (Lehman/BMW-Sauber) that exited the biz and got acquired, but has yielded mixed results since and are sort of stuck in the midfield.

Nomura/Toyota: Japanese big-hitters who've spent big in an effort to break in and disrupt the playing field, but yielded mediocre results (low market share/failing to establish as a top 3 constructor) and as a result has (largely) exited the biz (Nomura scaling down US and London operations/Toyota exiting F1 completely).

that's all I can think of so far....any thoughts?

all credits go to the GoT post! great inspiration

EDIT: oh my god guys did not expect all the love - thanks everyone

67 Comments
 

I'd put Wells as Marussia/HRT - newcoming backmarkers who cant seem to find much success

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 
Funniest

Trying to think of something for Racing Point. Getting railed by Vijay during their Force India days and getting bought out of admin by Stroll and now the AM Works team for '21.

Had decent talent with Ocon, good talent with Perez then Lance got the seat thanks to the bailout. Anyone got any idea?

 

I'll repost my reply here:

RBC/(T)Racing Point: Trying to copy the (business) model of J.P. Morgan/Mercedes but on a much smaller budget. Questionable results thus far. Canadian backing too.

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw
 

Could be Gary Cohn since they both fit in the Chosen One/Golden Child category but he left so idk.

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 

Leclerc is that hardo 2nd yr analyst who says "I'm working - need to analyze the data" whenever people ask him what he's up to at any given time. Given an early 2nd year bump to associate though so I am happy for him

Love the guy though - real driving talent.

 

So is Vettel the guy who made MD before 30 but struggled to win deals ever since?

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 

ahahhahaa not gonna lie I struggled with MS/Red Bull

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 

lol yeah I'm aware of the rebranding but the team is best known as Sauber and longtime fans usually call it as such

also I dont think CS and UBS are necessarily Toro Rosso and Haas. There's a reason I left them out - literally could not draw parallels between the 2 banks and f1 teams (past & present)

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 

RBC/(T)Racing Point: Trying to copy the (business) model of J.P. Morgan/Mercedes but on a much smaller budget. Questionable results thus far. Canadian backing too.

Unicredit/Alpha Tauri: The weird, plucky Italian version of Morgan Stanley/Red Bull. Just happy to be on a tombstone/at a GP.

Centerview (or any other EB)/Haas: Started out of the gate strong after pulling a bunch of talent with GS/Ferrari pedigree. How well they succeed without a balance sheet/big budget is an open question.

On another note. Given Ferrari's ability to always screw up a championship due to bad cars/internal politics, they might even warrant the DB moniker. Especially seeing as they haven't won anything since 2008.

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw
 

What bank is rife with nepotism? That's Racing Point. The fact that they somehow managed to secure Aston Martin as a title sponsor for next season is just icing on the turd.

 

Williams to join em soon...likely Latifi's dad buys the gig from Claire

which honestly is a good thing IMO. that woman's been running the franchise to the ground.....

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 

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"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room
 

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