Is there something badass about chewing gum?

Whenever I see someone chewing gum it seems to make them exude a bit more confidence than is normally the case... especially if their mouth is open and you can see it. Totally badass. Seeing someone chewing over a period of time subconsciously makes you think that they are nourished, have energy, and are the alpha leader of their tribe and bang bitches allday erday. Also chewing gum is illegal in Singapore/sometimes you weren't allowed to chew gum in school... so deciding to chew gum is kind of like smoking cigs in that it's badass because people told you not to do it but you did it anyway. Is chewing gum a BSD move? Will I get a return offer if I chew gum while at work during my internship?

12 Comments
 
Funniest

Dude What The Fuck Did I Just Read

You're definitely not alpha, you definitely don't bang bitches, and you definitely don't have an internship; and chewing gum isn't fucking going to change your miserable life

thots & prayers
 

No. Chewing gum is definitely not bad ass. Now if the dude had a big wad of chew in his mouth and just spit on whatever/whoever he wanted, that would be badass, hilarious and disgusting at the same time. The trifecta.

 

Only if it's Nicorette.

Show's you used to smoke like a badass, can get over smoking like a badass, and are so badass you're stressed out and need nicotine in your life. Also shows you have to make a lot of money because it's so expensive. Which is badass.

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
 

If it was possible to disinvent chewing gum I would do so in a heartbeat.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
 

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