Sharted. Protocol Zero.

"My friend" sharted. Going protocol zero. What would you do? Go to the bathroom and pray to the gods for a moment that it will be empty so you can exit the stall and toss your underwear? Again, "asking for a friend."

23 Comments
 

Here is what you do.

Give your "friend" some Alka-seltzer. Have your "friend" chew on a whole bunch of them and then pretend to start seizing on the ground like an autistic money at a daft punk concert. Everyone will assume the pressure of being a banker gave you an epileptic episode and you'll be spirited away from your cubicle for a free four day weekend. On Monday morning either your desk will be cleared out or you will find out if any of the VP's and Associates has a safe contact for "things".

Alternatively you could buy everyone in the office free tacos to mask the smell and then get your "friend" some pants.

 

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Et expedita amet velit. Est consequatur soluta voluptatem non et. Doloribus est molestiae et. Tenetur voluptates incidunt fuga. Dolores alias autem alias ut alias excepturi.

Quisquam eum enim ad dolor praesentium animi commodi hic. Quidem saepe magni sunt et sunt nesciunt enim. Rerum quam maiores ab asperiores est laudantium omnis.

 

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