Weaseling out when you're sure your goose is cooked.
Hi. Have you ever seen someone you were sure fucked the pooch so badly they were going to get shit-canned, but who managed to live to fuck up another day?
(I haven't fucked up royally myself recently. I'm just bored, and apparently am a fan/collector of funny stories about how inept motherfuckers have managed to avoid their well-deserved fates.)
I know a guy older that me that continually failed up into the position he held in my company. Knew nothing, did a terrible job, constantly blamed others for his mistakes, and then moved to another company in a higher position with a material role in risk management. i wish it was a publicly traded company so i could short it.
My dad had this book years ago called "The Seven Habits of Highly Uneffective People." Obviously, this was back when all the suburban haus fraus and middle management meatballs were reading "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People." There were many lazy, half-assed spoofs of that book, but this particular one was hilarious. It was written in the persona of an old school, Mainline WASP whose shtick was that his family had mastered the art of failing upwards. The worst thing about the advice dispatched in the book ("Float from project to project like a honeybee, leaving your scent behind enough to take credit for the good ones but making sure not to land long enough to be accountable for the bad ones," and "Appear friendly and welcoming, but always be secretly aggressive and intensely territorial about your own niche,") is how well it actually works.
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