Classics of Millenial Behavior
Got a lot of hilarious responses on the thread about "Classics of Boomer Behavior" (https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/classics-o…)
Wanted to sequel it and poke a little fun at ourselves as a bunch of whiny, entitled millennials. I'm kicking it off with the below, classic millennial behaviors:
- Thinks ducking his head under the cubicle means nobody will notice the vape cloud that slowly rises from his desk area every 30 minutes
- Having several "quick doctor appointments" two years into the job, at the precise time that on-cycle PE recruiting happens to be and somehow every Analyst 2 has their doctor appointments scheduled during the same month
- "Have" to work from home for the entire day because you have a 30 minute errand that needs to be ran mid-day, despite the office being closer to the errand than your apartment and all three locations being within a 2 mile radius
- Dating a girl you met off Tinder a month ago and talking like a married man "Yep, check out my new beard fellas. Long as the Misses likes it I'm in the clear"
- Pretending that you can't do something via CapIQ / Pitchbook / Excel that you totally can do but just don't want to do because you think it's a stupid request and your boomer MD wont know that you're lying
- Thinking your super chill boomer MD, who totally notices all of the aforementioned, but doesn't call you out because he was young once too is senile when he's really just a bro
Bragging about your "side gig" when you suck at your main gig
Chipotle slaps though
Non-pleated chinos are basically pjs
Who still wears pleated chinos?
Boomers of course
The non chino comment hit way too hard. Goddam
You're joking about the pleated chinos right? You don't actually consider buying them do you?
Cites that WLB is very important during an interview for an IB role
Disappears at a certain time in a work day, almost religiously, to get a work out in.
In team chats, every sentence/phrase is a new line as opposed to a message consolidated in a paragraph, causing the communication app to buzz very frequently (sorry).
Just trying to bump
"Bro we're 100% as productive during WFH as we are in-office. Like, if anything I'm more productive" but also smokes hella weed and watches sports center all day when working from home
Damn mate. You didn't have to read me like that
Damn lmao got me
tbh most people on this website are gen-z not millennials
Quits two weeks into the job after experiencing their first 4am or all-nighter.
- panic attack after receiving even minimal comments to a deck
Not answering the phone and responding with an email saying "sorry I missed your call"
“I met a girl and I don’t want to do this anymore”
Half of this is Gen Z, not millennial. The oldest millennial is 41 years old now lol.
I feel bad for them. Everyone conflates those two cohorts so they're not even distinctive in popular culture.
these comments seem to demonstrate some very good self-reflection but really curious to see what gen z's (aka upcoming interns) think of us millennials
Who cares what Gen Z thinks, those guys are queers. ~Sends Gen Z analyst fag 800 poorly written comments in obtuse, handwritten cursive just to fuck with him~
Are you my associate?
Pronouns
Humble bragging “incoming summer IB analyst” title for 8+ months
I’m going to weather the next wave of restructuring by volunteering for the bank’s steering committee to advocate for LGBTQ community
Rallying folks incessantly to join the boilerplate firm I&D call just to make sure one is coming across as woke
Having four different internships by the time you graduate from an ivy-league school $100K in debt...only to work for a boomer MD at a LMM who went to St. Johns and owns a house in Montauk plus a yacht.
Please tell me someone has created, or plans to create, a Classics of GenX Behavior as well.
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