Fired from PE firm for getting too drunk at company outing
To give a bit of background, I recently landed an associate gig at a pretty respectable PE shop ($5 bill aum) in the Chicago area (after 2 years of banking). I started about a month ago after packing up and moving my whole life from California. Well needless to say we had a company outing and I got belligerent and embarrassingly drunk and basically tried to fight a coworker and said some unforgivable things. I was fired the next day and have officially hit rock bottom...I just moved to this new city, signed a lease and unsure what the next step is. Just venting a little and looking for some encouraging advice on next steps and how to approach this...thanks guys
You should probably take a hiatus from worrying about your job and focus on solving that drinking problem. I have seen this before and imagine that if it happened to you at a company outing of all places, it is probably not the first time it has occurred and burned bridges, whether that be with friends, coworkers, whomever.
I had a problem controlling my drinking right after college. I still enjoy it, but I give myself a hard and fast rule that I won't drink with coworkers, regardless of how close I may be with them. The risk is certainly not worth the reward; I mean, there really is no reward. Anyways, figured I'd digress and make this a bit more personal to hopefully be impactful on your thinking.
You can get over this. You don't have to list this employer down the road on your resume down the road, but you need to fill the time with something interesting. Maybe you need a reality check: go spend 6 months in the Dominican
You should probably take a hiatus from worrying about your job and focus on solving that drinking problem. I have seen this before and imagine that if it happened to you at a company outing of all places, it is probably not the first time it has occurred and burned bridges, whether that be with friends, coworkers, whomever.
I had a problem controlling my drinking right after college. I still enjoy it, but I give myself a hard and fast rule that I won't drink with coworkers, regardless of how close I may be with them. The risk is certainly not worth the reward; I mean, there really is no reward. Anyways, figured I'd digress and make this a bit more personal to hopefully be impactful on your thinking.
You can get over this. You don't have to list this employer down the road on your resume down the road, but you need to fill the time with something interesting. Maybe you need a reality check: go spend 6 months in the Dominican Republic, Haiti, Ghana, etc.. and volunteer. You think you hit rock bottom? Try going weeks without access to clean water. Hopefully that will make you think more holistically about what it means to be a good human being, which is certainly not as simplistically defined as earning 6 figures and working in "high finance".
After you have done something like this to broaden your perspective, I think anyone with the slightest interest in the human condition would give you a chance. They will probably see through / get to the bottom of what happened, but will understand that you took an active approach to change your life. Trust me, a lost year can buy back many if you spend it the right way; don't spiral.
Important beyond this specific problem.
First of all, finish your unsettled business with your ex-coworker. Your former employer will likely see this as a sign of persistence and integrity. By beating him up, it shows that you are a man of your word; doing it even though you're sober shows that you can stay focused to complete a difficult task. After beating him up, it wouldn't hurt to email HR and let them know of your martial superiority and broach the idea of being rehired to take his position. Any employer who doesn't look favorably on this, is probably not someone you want to work for anyways. Tuck your chin, keep your elbows down and your fists up, and best of luck.
Feel like I post this too much on this forum, but would recommend deleting / generalizing the specifics of your post. I believe there are only 3 firms in Chicago that size.
Just some friendly advice: Not good to be so public with a matter so sensitive.
i'll take this one OP: you're a hardo/loser
you're a hardo/loser
Who does that?
Edit: Just so people get the context, since poster now edited his post: this guy essentially said he texted all his buddies in Chicago to try to get the full story.
Sorry to hear you got the sack, mate - never pleasant to experience, regardless of the circumstances. That said, you need to take a long, hard look in the mirror: you'd landed a very cushy job, had only just started, and on the first night out with your new colleagues you got aggressively drunk and attempted to fight a coworker. Not on.
First things first, determine whether you have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. Are you able to control your drinking once you start? Is this the first time you've turned fighty after a few?
Secondly, what lead to the confrontation in question? Was it a case where your coworkers were encouraging you to drink more and more (like an initiation of sorts), riling you up? Or was it entirely of your own doing? If it was the former, may well not be the right work environment for you and will at least give you something credible to say if a future interviewer brings anything up.
Sucks that you've moved your entire life for the role, but that's water under the bridge. If you got the role at what is seemingly a very reputably firm once, I'm sure you can get something comparable elsewhere again - go back on the application track and spam. Omit your most recent employer for obvious reasons.
I'd also suggest reaching out to your former coworkers (if you haven't already) and making some apologies. I highly doubt it will help you get your job back, but it's the gentlemanly thing to do - will prove you're not above your own pride and that you at least have some degree of self respect. Will also hopefully soften their opinion of you and make them less inclined to sabotage your future efforts to secure employment elsewhere.
Address the drinking issue: The outcome wasn't that bad. You might have killed someone by DUI or some other heavier shit.
This might be life giving you a second chance.
Am I the only one who is dying to hear what "unforgivable" things he said? I don't think I have ever heard unforgivable things being said. "I killed your parents!" maybe? I can also see why something like "I sold your kids to a sex slave lord" might turn the work environment a bit toxic...
Sounds like you're very immature in general. Although fighting is obviously never (rarely?) condoned in the workplace, an incident like this just shows why you aren't ready for a PE role. Not to preach from a PE superiority type of view, but whether you're a PE associate a banking associate or any other role that is no longer entry-level, you start to take on some more serious responsibility. You might have to manage people, you represent a firm, you're responsible for client happiness, closing deals etc. To not be able to control yourself in a relatively tame and straightforward setting shows that your EQ, maturity, and general decision-making skills have to be extremely low.
Perhaps you have a serious drinking problem and that would probably give you a clearer path for what you need to fix. If you don't, then I'd focus on cleaning your life up, first of all, accept the firing with grace, show contrition, and move on. Try to minimize the damage.
Bummer you might have to eat your lease for a year, but maybe you can find a way to get our of it. Maybe you can sublet it? Or just pay the lease break fee. At the end of the day if you go to the management office and say "Hey, I just lost my job, I have no money, need to get out of my lease, here' sthe best I can do, I'd imagine they rather get something out of you rather than nothing. Maybe you'll even get lucky and only have to pay a few months of rent. This should be a good first challenge of handling an adult level responsibility.
From here, In conjuction with finding a new job, figure out what you need to do to be better. If you are an alcoholic, seek help, check into rehab, etc. If not, you might need to see a therapist, take some time off, was the drinking/beligerance driven by something else. Are you too tightly wound from 2 years in banking? Have you taken time off recently? Maybe you just felt a lot of pressure from joining a Megafund? I'd make sure to get your mind right before just hopping back into a banking/PE role. Maybe move home for a little if that's an option, reassess what you want to do.
As much as this seems like an awful, rock bottom moment, it's better to learn earlier rather than later. You're probably 23/24, plently of life left to live. This one mistake won't make/break your career/happiness. Keep your help up, try and be more self-aware moving forward, and learn from your mistake.
Lastly, be thankful it didn't cause more harm. Imagine if instead you got drunk, tried to drive yourself home, and then crashed into another car.
Honestly, from getting very candid perspectives from people who grew up in the "old street", drinking and making alcohol-driven mistakes was not as looked down upon as it is now, particularly amongst the trading and public markets community. I feel as though these platforms give a voice and expectation of this antiquated reality as being the norm across all of "high finance". However, it isn't hard to tell that most of the partners amongst the largest private equity firms are NOT the type to be two drinks away from completely losing their composure and temperance. The level of EQ some people have entering this industry amazes me, but I agree with mrharveyspecter. If you are more than two years out and still acting like a spoiled frat boy, go sell used cars. Most likely one less impotent child working in an industry of gentlemen. I've always been of the mind that the hard truth is the best truth, so there it is OP. A 750 is a grown man's pacifier - spit it out. I really hope this is a troll at the end of the day, but best of luck.
Are you looking for work in PE still? I can see if we have a VC role for you to help you get back on your feet. No judgement whatsoever. Life has gotten the best of all of us and it is good that you are aware of the problem now. Hopefully you can surround yourself with people who don't have these bad habits and can help you get better. Your health should be the main focus.
EDIT: Not sure who hated on this but theres nothing wrong with helping someone out in this type of position so they aren't stressing about rent etc and can get better
Let's look at it from a different perspective. You could become the first monkey to make the transition IB -> PE -> UFC.