Does anyone else get a bit offended?

I know I shouldn't have my personality wrapped up in my job and I make an active effort to avoid doing that. I also know the prestige and the name of your school, company, what brand watch you wear doesn't matter. all that much However, I can't help but get a bit offended/annoyed when people think I'm a residential real estate agent. It's the worst with my mom and dad (who are Asian) and they ask why I bothered going to school just to end up selling houses. My girlfriend always asks me when I'm going to be on million-dollar listing. It's all just a bit disappointing.

33 Comments
 

Used to try explaining to people. Now when someone says something about houses, I just go along with it lol. Ends the convo quicker and I don't need to waste energy explaining something to them that they will not understand anyways. less you care, more easier your life will be. Even if you worked in IB, majority of people wouldn’t truly know what bankers do.

 

True - it's not hard to explain. However, it is hard for common people to truly understand and more importantly, remeber. I've explained to relatives who understand it in the moment. See them a month later and they're back to thinking we sell homes. It's not a industry many common people may be familiar with. If you say you build stuff, they think your a contractor. It’s hard to break peoples common perceptions unless it’s reinforced a few times over.

 

What kind of relationship do you have with your girlfriend/parents that they don't understand that your job isn't selling houses? Did you ever bother to explain what you do?

 

Isn't commercial real estate easy as fuck to explain? Just say you're like a real estate agent but you buy and sell on behalf of corporations instead of individuals, and instead of detached houses and condos its office buildings or shopping malls or whatever.

 

Just say instead of houses, you work with buildings. My mom is Asian, and I don’t tell her what I do either. She gets the gist that it’s real estate finance but doesn’t know or care about the details. She doesn’t need to, and neither do your parents. Sounds like you want them to, though, so they know what an elite investment professional you are. 

 

Some parents get or don't get it, yours gets it and doesn't bother you with what OP is describing. The annoyance comes from how OP made a seemingly dumb, inexplicable decision to go to an expensive college to sell houses. There's a difference between superiority (elitism) and just being understood ("Dad, I didn't waste all this money").

 

Yeah, it's this. "selling houses" is used in an insulting way sometimes. They just don't like the fact I went into CRE instead of going to medical school. It's just that I want them to understand what the role is and the doors it can open down the line. Also, I really do enjoy CRE and sales and have wanted to be in this field since I was a freshmen, so it would be nice if they could be a bit more supportive or keep their disappointment to themselves.

 

You’re probably not explaining your position simply enough. I’d blame yourself before others. 
 

But also, you’re an intern in real estate? What do you really even do and how long have you been doing it. The reality might be that you’re doing a job a high school dropout could do and the reason why is because it opens doors to more impressive work.

Sounds like you care too much about what other people think. Be humble, work hard and let the results speak for themeselves

 

Frankly, flying under the radar is better than being in the spotlight, unless you're a broker where all the value you add is the glamour of your name

 

I am a broker. There is a part of me that wants my parents to know what I do. Not because it's prestigious but because it sucks they think I wasted money to ''sell houses'' instead of a doctor or engineer like they wanted me to.

 
It's the worst with my mom and dad (who are Asian) and they ask why I bothered going to school just to end up selling houses. My girlfriend always asks me when I'm going to be on million-dollar listing. It's all just a bit disappointing.

^This is like the most depressing comment I've read on WSO in awhile. What are you telling your family and significant other? I get when randos at a bar respond with "so should I buy a house now?" when you casually say you work in "real estate", but I'd think your family should know! This is on you, you can fix that.

Note... I'm still not 100% my wife can explain my job that well, but she knows I'm not a resi agent lol. You will be fine! 

 

The GF part was a joke, she bought it up with a few times to annoy me. As for my parents this a reply to another comment.

"selling houses" is used in an insulting way sometimes. They just don't like the fact I went into CRE instead of going to medical school. It's just that I want them to understand what the role is and the doors it can open down the line. Also, I really do enjoy CRE and sales and have wanted to be in this field since I was a freshmen, so it would be nice if they could be a bit more supportive or keep their disappointment to themselves.

 

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