Cover Letter Advice Please

Hi!

I am preparing a round of applications for investment banking and would love to know what you think about this.

I'll leave the letter updated after you post your comments, so that this can be left as an educational reading for the time to come.

Dear Director of Human Resources:

Skrrrrrrrr

4 Comments
 
"MBS"

Get rid of your opening line,

A simple 'Dear Sir or Madam' is absolutely fine. Dear Director of Human resources sounds insane. You have good experience just cut this down and make it more succinct.

haha first time hearing the insanity of my opening line.... i've changed it :) Also cutting this down is the main problem, i'm not sure what to cut down as I feel it's all relevant. Proper doing my head in

 

I just think you can summarize things. You use quite a lot of real estate talking about how you experience has given you the stamina your degree has given you the stamina etc.... i don't think its a hugely important example to keep referencing when it should be a given attribute.

 

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