This is going to McKinsey!

Hey,

I'd love to have some feedback on my resume I wrote. I'm about to send it off to about every existing consulancy so it'd be great to ensure it has no huge mistakes or errors.

Are my bulletpoints fine?

Any opinion is greatly appreciated. Even if just first impression! No need to read it all, no one ever will :P

Thanks a lot:)

http://www.razume.com/documents/28005

 

flashmobs? really? you're going to want to have to explain that to a 40+ year old, good luck

"After you work on Wall Street it’s a choice, would you rather work at McDonalds or on the sell-side? I would choose McDonalds over the sell-side.” - David Tepper
 

Is "shaking up London" a positive impact? Echoing oreos, I think flash mobs are fantastic, but many people associate them with shoplifting and vandalism. Maybe think of a stronger way to frame a spontaneous gathering for a good purpose or marketing campaign, or whatever you guys were doing aside from shaking up London?

 
jeremy07:
Is "shaking up London" a positive impact? Echoing oreos, I think flash mobs are fantastic, but many people associate them with shoplifting and vandalism. Maybe think of a stronger way to frame a spontaneous gathering for a good purpose or marketing campaign, or whatever you guys were doing aside from shaking up London?

Thanks for your feedback. Would you recommend that I take the flashmob part out? I actually just inserted it back in today, thinking it's something cool to remember. "shaking up London" was something I literally just wrote in before uploading the resume...Should I rephrase or just delete the whole thing?

Thanks!

 
Best Response
erklam:
jeremy07:
Is "shaking up London" a positive impact? Echoing oreos, I think flash mobs are fantastic, but many people associate them with shoplifting and vandalism. Maybe think of a stronger way to frame a spontaneous gathering for a good purpose or marketing campaign, or whatever you guys were doing aside from shaking up London?

Thanks for your feedback. Would you recommend that I take the flashmob part out? I actually just inserted it back in today, thinking it's something cool to remember. "shaking up London" was something I literally just wrote in before uploading the resume...Should I rephrase or just delete the whole thing?

Thanks!

If you have better/more important stuff you can add (or details for stuff already on your resume), then take it off. Otherwise, definitely reword it (maybe better describe the actual goals your group had, the accomplishments it had, results, etc.)

 

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