Private banking and wealth destruction?

Hi dear sirs and mdms, I research/dabble in investment ideas for a multi family office (a.k.a. external asset manager here). We are roughly USD300M net in size, accounts can be between USD1-200M. Recently have become extremely jaded due to the culture, wondering if it's just us or is it the same for all MFOs.

Our conversations revolve around spreads, margins, commissions, how much to charge client. Never about investment performance, we do not even have a system/framework in place to account for investment performance, and most of the accounts are not charged performance fee. What really irked me was a conversation/trade placed by a banker last week - allocating 17% of the portfolio into a single AT2 bond to capture 2% more yield over the risk free rate (because money market instruments/t-bills/fixed deposits don’t pay/pay little commissions). We were also hit quite hard by the CS AT1 write off. 

I find it cute that bankers are using ANR function on BBG to recommend stocks to clients, and are always recommending stocks ex post (momentum chasing). Also, fixed coupon structured notes are a staple (all weather product) here. Oh, bankers bullish on a stock? Run a FCN with 12% coupon with strike 85%. At maturity if structure hits strike, then tell client good we got it at a discount at strike - explains how deep out of the money we are in Chinese counters accumulated since pre-covid. 

I understand that in the banks they have no choice but to churn accounts for revenue targets but aren't we supposed to be portfolio stewards, now we have moved out of banks to set up our shop? Excuse me for the rant. Please help me understand if I am too naive to believe that there are MFOs out there aligned with clients' interests or is that just the reality of MFOs/private wealth management?