How did becoming wealthier affect your social life outside of dating?

Postgradwonderer's picture
Rank: King Kong | 1,348

I know some guys in here lucked out in the sense that they grew up in nicer areas but for those of us who weren't raised in private schools or upper middle class type of places, are more "new money", and started getting wealthier after college as our 20s progressed I would like to get inputs from.

It seems like a "social network" or social life is gifted to a lot of the kids who had wealthier parents and grew up in wealthier areas where a lot of their high school classmates went off to nice universities. These were also the same kids who went towards rushing fraternities in college and that was a big help to their social network without a doubt.

Many say it is tough to meet new friends and form new social circles (if any) after you graduate college and there is the whole stigma attached to making close friends with coworkers.

For the guys in here who started getting wealthy into their 20s, how did becoming wealthier affect your social life in regards to making new friends and finding a new circle of like minded people to be a part of?

Comments (55)

Jun 27, 2017

I was still too shy

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Jun 27, 2017

stopped drinking natty ice and canned beer - now purchase slightly better beer / alcohol

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Jun 27, 2017

drink alone?

Jun 27, 2017

no lol - at sporting games or small town bars when I go back

Jul 11, 2017

I buy natty in bottles to show that I've got a bit of dough now but money didn't change me

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Jul 1, 2017

Well, guess not that many older guys want to talk about this because they are busy with their awesome social lives.

Jul 8, 2017

Im only a second year analyst, but a lot of my friends don't work in finance, or even have professional jobs yet (think retail, bartenders, etc.). Never changed anything.

Jul 8, 2017

that kinda sucks

Jul 8, 2017
Postgradwonderer:

that kinda sucks

For them? I think they'll be okay.

Best Response
Jul 9, 2017

I'm not in my mid-20s anymore, but when I started making a lot more money I noticed that my social circles started changing from hanging out with people who were just slinging their 9-5 so they could rage on the weekend engaged in mind numbing BS like gossip to socializing with people who were trying to build their own empires and create something. There are two breeds of people in life. Those who think life is outside their control and content just trying to get by with the hand their dealt and those who are want to control their lives and be way above average or extraordinary. There is nothing wrong with the former, but I've always thought that to live an extraordinary life I should be socializing and learning from people more successful than me.

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Jul 9, 2017

Got a lot of IG followers?

LOL, I gave you a silver banana for your well done response though.

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Jul 10, 2017

LOL... Took me a minute to catch on there. Haven't played a video game since my last year in college.

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Jul 12, 2017

nice +1

Jul 12, 2017

Agreed. I have noticed people from my childhood who maybe didn't go to college etc still talk about their salaries in x amount of $, crazy investment/get rich quick schemes, & are really preoccupied with meaningless symbols of wealth (they can't afford). Whereas people I know who went to college & have good jobs talk about how to make their life better, fun experiences, and interesting books, podcasts, opportunities. In general.

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Jul 14, 2017

SB'd. Loved the part about the two breeds of people in life

Jul 9, 2017

Enables you to go out/eat a lot more. Grabbing drinks and food at nice places is expensive.

My boss drops at least a few hundred a night.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Jul 9, 2017

Ya but you still need to make friends and have them to go out with man....

Which everyone says is very tough to do after college.

Jul 9, 2017
Postgradwonderer:

Ya but you still need to make friends and have them to go out with man....

Which everyone says is very tough to do after college.

bro, i roll in solo and make 5 friends

It's not hard

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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Jul 10, 2017

Making more money makes making friends easier.

You can shop at fairway/whole foods, join intramural leagues, go on efcollegebreak, go to a basketball game, go to a music festival

Money lets you have experiences, these experiences will be attended by like minded individuals - if you cant make friends with people who share the same interests as you thats on you

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Jul 10, 2017

LOL... Fairway is considered making it?

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Jul 10, 2017

Parents shopped at Walmart/Associated when I was a child, currently use Fairway/WholeFoods.

Maybe Eataly is better than those, but marginally at best

If you really made it I guess you dont really grocery shop, but as someone who wasnt born rich to six figures I feel I could contribute

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Jul 14, 2017

That's true. I have more experiences, like going to a playoff game in a suite. No new friends.

Jul 16, 2017

go on efcollegebreak?

Jul 10, 2017

More golf.

Jul 11, 2017

So much more golf, and now i can throw down for my dad and grand dad whenever we hit the links, which is about as baller as i get these days lol.

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Jul 10, 2017

Friend groups definitely seem to evolve as your income ramps. I am lucky in that I have a tight group of guys from high school days and we do a trip once a year, so that keeps me somewhat grounded (middle class town). But for sure my friends from business school came from wealthier backgrounds than my friends from college or youth. And now that we are having kids there is a new friend group of other new parents that is emerging and some of these ppl are straight balled out. Probably has to do with buying into a good school district so we're surrounded by other higher income folks at this point, but I am reasonably certain that we're the poorest ones in some of the "Mother's Club" type situations that my wife has gotten us involved in. Frankly most of those people annoy the shit out of me but there are a couple cool dads that will go out for drinks or a bike ride once in awhile.

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Jul 10, 2017

that sounds miserable man

Jul 16, 2017

While it might be necessary for where I want to go for my career, I really look forward to the social life aspect of business school.

Jul 10, 2017

What in the world is Fairway?

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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Jul 11, 2017

Coming from a poor black background, I felt a gap between my friends and I. I won't say they were jealous, but they are not confortable with my lifestyle

Oh no baby what it is you doin?

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Jul 11, 2017

Only new friends I have made are coworkers.

Jul 11, 2017
Ehmerica:

Only new friends I have made are coworkers.

that's real lame, bro

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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Jul 11, 2017

Not lame at all. Already have plenty of good friends. The work friends are just a different social dynamic than the friendships that I have already of established. Also, pretty solid mix of people in terms of views, tastes, hobbies, careers and goals. Enough characters to keep things interesting and a small enough crowd to not get over burdened with dramatic bull shit.

Jul 12, 2017
Ehmerica:

Only new friends I have made are coworkers.

Let's grab a beer

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Jul 11, 2017

Haven't become wealthy yet (in college) but I found that since I came from an upper middle class family it was far easier to relate to wealthy kids in college or network with higher net worth individuals as you know the language and share basic hobbies.

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Jul 11, 2017
Postgradwonderer:

Many say it is tough to meet new friends and form new social circles (if any) after you graduate college and there is the whole stigma attached to making close friends with coworkers.

I find this to be the opposite of what's happened in my life. I'm late 30's now. When I first moved to NYC I was broke/in debt and gradually started making more money. The more I made, the more I went out, went to concerts, joined beach house shares, etc. which made it easier to form strong friendships with others who also wanted to do those things (and were making similar money because they could also afford to go out).

I also became great friends with some of my co-workers. Three of my best friends to this day were in my group at my first job. I actually introduced two of them to their wives, and we all still hang out 15 years later.

You will drift away from some older friends from different stages of your life, but others you will keep up with.

Jul 16, 2017

At what stage of life was your social life the most active?

When did you make a lot of new friends?

Jul 17, 2017
Postgradwonderer:

At what stage of life was your social life the most active?

When did you make a lot of new friends?

From high school up until I had my daughter? Odd questions...each stage of life is fun in its own way, and I've made friends all along the way. If I had to pick one stage, late 20s/early 30s before marriage and kids is pretty fun. You (should) have the financial resources to basically do whatever you want socially/travel wise and a bit more flexibility from work than when you first start out.

Jul 11, 2017

Dude what's up with you and always making these "Does life get better after college...Frat this, rich kid that" posts. Go outside and talk to people man, life isn't as linear as you make it out to be. Granted they usually turn out to be interesting discussions but still..

Jul 16, 2017

Fair enough.

I am at a point in my life where my social life is hell and I find it hard to make new friends right now. I talk to people, even strangers, but it amounts to nothing. What I notice is that people have their social circles and it is tough to break into them for me and I never had one from my past to lean on for that social support. Social life is a huge struggle in life for me right now and one I want to really fix.

I also look at the future forecast to see how great things can potentially be :)

Jul 17, 2017
Postgradwonderer:

Fair enough.

I am at a point in my life where my social life is hell and I find it hard to make new friends right now. I talk to people, even strangers, but it amounts to nothing. What I notice is that people have their social circles and it is tough to break into them for me and I never had one from my past to lean on for that social support. Social life is a huge struggle in life for me right now and one I want to really fix.

I also look at the future forecast to see how great things can potentially be :)

Where do you live? Are you in some small town where everyone has known each other their entire lives?

It sounds to me that you need to pursue some activities with like minded people. Develop some hobbies and finding friends becomes easier. Join a softball league, a hiking club, cooking classes, whatever....spend some time on Meetup.com and search for whatever you're interested in. If you're not interested in anything, that is likely your problem because people with no interests are uninteresting themselves.

Jul 11, 2017
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