How to fail upwards

Ahh fuck, am in the same boat. Always had an imposter syndrome type feeling. I look around at my peers and am like how the fuck did I get here. I've also lost a lot of my drive and banking ambition over the last two years which sucks because I was always top bucket.

I don't intentionally screw up but I'm not dropping my 110% on everything. My work product has definitely regressed a couple of notches. It doesn't wow anyone or have amazing insight, it's probably somewhere between "decent" and "good", at least a level or two below where I was. I'm quite comfortable with how my MDs and our core client coverage thinks and views things, and that really helps. I think what really what carries me through are relationships and social capital.

I don't fuck with the junior team, they're the HEMI engine in my minivan. I staff them fairly, give them room to grow, client/senior exposure, roll up my sleeves and get into the work (reluctantly), I train them (half heartedly), push back on unreasonable deadlines and NEVER EVER throw them under the bus or take credit for their work. I like them, they like me and have dug me out of some holes. They're good peoples and I will always go tot bat for them. This is relationships + social capital part 1.

I have good relationships with the right seniors. Have worked with all the MDs at one time or the other, thankfully before losing my drive lol. Have a reputation. Am told am  likeable (whatever that is, I don't want to be it) and some of our bigger coverage names have apparently enjoyed working with me. I get a lot of bonus points from senior bankers for keeping the staffing efficient (I don't really) and recruiting rockstar juniors (they're fucking amazing). This is social capital part 2.

I do pull my weight, execute whatever files I get and do a decent job, although NOWHERE NOWHERE near what I'm capable off. Given my situation, am certain I have a ceiling unless I pull my head out of my ass but who the fuck knows. I made it this far.