I read a lot and have a lot of info in my head, but when it comes to expressing my opinions on things, I have trouble. It's like there's so many arguments on both sides of things that I think make some sense that I don't have any strong stance toward any one side. I want to be able to synthesize this info and generate my own unique insights about the world and talk about them comfortably. Anyone else struggle with this or have advice?
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Would also like to know.
I mean I don’t really see the problem with not having a strong stance on EVERY issue. It’s okay to straddle across the middle and honestly, it shows individual thinking IMO. People that all have the same opinions on every single issue tend to just be following the herd, at least in my experience.
Talk less. Smile more. Don't let them know what you're against or what you're for.
Absolutely. Don’t give people a reason to dislike you. Be on good terms with everyone.
If you stand for nothing, sir, what’ll you fall for?
Christ. First "how to be a man" and now this.
What has WSO come to? Are you guys not capable of thinking for yourselves?
A Redpill awakening
I suffer from the same problem as you, but not with stronger opinions, rather I was trying too hard to think like a contrarian. Howard Marks really helps me when he said: "Unconventionality shouldn't be a goal in itself, but rather a way of thinking." (Simple As... quoted him and it just really resonated with me).
I'd say what you're doing is the first step. Consider both sides of the coins, and then whichever side you agree more with, verbalize why you think so, and share that with your friends/anyone willing to listen and have a debate. This really does require training. I would get into a debate with a few very smart people, and they would really rebut my points and back me into a corner. That's when I knew I still have space for refinement of my thoughts, and then it's just learn from that - rinse & repeat. Good luck!
Replied above
Honestly one thing that might help is to put down the books/information sources every now and then and just sit alone with your thoughts about whatever it is you want to make an opinion about.
Sure, you might not be making the most informed opinion if you’re lacking certain information, but the exercise will help you start learning how to use those critical thinking muscles. You can always go back to the information source and compare it with your opinion.
Another good exercise is to instead of looking at objective pieces of information, seek out those explicitly opinion-based, and instead of just kind of skimming it, try to argue or clarify line by line with your own thoughts.
Just start arguing with people and then you'll make an opinion pretty quickly. Alternatively, run for local office and see how that goes.
Pick a side and stick with it until someone can provide you with compelling evidence to the contrary
I don't think you need to have strong opinions on things. you need to have strong values, but the world is complicated, and getting entrenched in your beliefs on matters like what's often discussed in politics can be dangerous.
I have my values - those are non negotiable, they make up a system by which I live my life
I have my convictions - things that have proven themselves time and time again to be correct, but they are not so deeply rooted as to be values. an example of this is "stocks for the long run." I think it's a permanent fact, but it could be uprooted by some unknown unknown, so it's not set in stone yet
I have my opinions - things that are complicated, I've done some work to formulate an opinion on, but maybe they crack or fall apart if stretched over a long enough time scale or put under enough scrutiny. an example of this might be my opinion that the vast majority of health issues in this world can be avoided if you exercise, eat properly, are not overweight, avoid smoking and excessive drinking, and therefore most medicines for cholesterol and diabetes are treating the symptom, not the root cause, and therefore are unnecessary if people made lifestyle changes. that's an opinion, but there is likely evidence out there to prove me wrong.
someone said it above, the best way to get your opinions firm is to write them out. I also think in person debate is helpful (internet debates are bullshit mostly), whether actually in person, via phone, or facetime. you get instant feedback on your construction of an argument and that's very valuable. I also think speechwriting can be a helpful way to tighten up an opinion. next, realize that everyone you are arguing/discussing with has different worldviews and priorities. often times my family's thanksgiving discussions get into politics (I'm sure I'm not alone here), but because my priority is economic wellbeing (I think this solves so many issues in the world), my ideas can seem at odds with family members who want to treat what I view as symptoms of an underlying problem. we end up talking past each other until I realize they just see things differently. does it mean they're wrong? maybe, but maybe I'm wrong, you need to check yourself here.
finally, humility. you may begin this journey of writing something down and realize you don't have a ton of evidence to back it up or your argument is flimsy at best. have the humility to say "I guess I really don't know" and realize THATS OK. having the humility to allow yourself to be wrong will enable you to enter discussions without ego, because you are not so attached to your beliefs that if you are proven wrong, it is taken as an attack on you the person, just an idea that you may hold but now question. that's totally OK.
Talk to people in real life. Get comfortable with it. People don’t react like they do how you imagine and being comfortable with how they do their own thing is something that you need to get confident doing if you aren’t already.
ALL CAPS AND SHOUT
PINEAPPLE DOES NOT BELONG ON PIZZA, GODDAMNIT!!!!!!
LOUD NOISES
With cancel culture is it even worth it to have a strong opinion irl these days? Genuinely curious
Well apparently "silence is violence" these days so....
If you’re trying to prove something, it’s essential.
My advice, stop masturbating. Fapping makes people tired, passive, and yielding, and lowers your testosterone. If you stop masturbating, your testosterone levels will rise, and you will find, all of the sudden, you take things more seriously and are more active about defending your opinions.
Not sure how true this is, I yack it fairly regularly and have strong views.
Pick a side, any fucking side, don’t try and make any sense of it. Then defend it vehemently, even if logic tells you otherwise
It sounds like you just need to do enough research to hold a strong argument. So do the research and hold the argument.
This is a good read for you: https://www.amazon.com/Five-Types-Legal-Argument-Third/dp/1611635888/re…
I had similar issues when first starting out FT - generally this stemmed from one of two things: feeling like I lacked knowledge on the subject matter or feeling like I wanted to stay neutral in conversations with superiors.
It seems to me your issue is more in point 1, as you say you want to be able to generate and articulate opinions while the conversation naturally progresses. The easiest way to do this is to read as much as possible. Understandably, you won't have much free time when you hit the desk but reading a WSJ article in the morning or working through a book on weekends is a great way to expand your worldview and get the gears turning during a conversation. My last book was The Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain (RIP the goat) and it gave me perspectives on ideas that never would've crossed my mind previously. Last week on zoom a colleague of mine got in a discussion with an MD after a watching a sommelier doc. You get the point -it can come from random sources but it gives you the ability to contribute in unexpected convos.
I know there are some books out there such as How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson that a few on this site swear by. Can't speak to either of these personally, but these could be a good starting point to work on the mental aspect of it.
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