Investment Banks as Formula One Teams

Dick O'Grady's picture
Rank: Orangutan | 265

Bored at work and just finished binging F1: drive to survive on Netflix.....

Soooo here goes:

Goldman Sachs/Scuderia Ferrari:The undisputed GOAT franchise. May not always be #1 in the league table/standings but has been consistently top-ranking for decades, not to mention the unparalleled prestige of making partner at GS/driving for Ferrari. Despised by other teams for their proximity to the governing body (Government Sachs/Ferrari International Assistance) and questionable favoritism.

J.P. Morgan/Mercedes:Old legacy brand which went dormant for decades (Morgan's commercial banking days/Mercedes' non-involvement in f1 until 2000s) that resurged in recent years (post-crisis/hybrid engine era) and proceeded to dominate the league tables/grid (JPM crushing league tables vs Mercedes winning 6 championships in a row) using their large balance sheets/R&D from Brawn GP.

Morgan Stanley/Red Bull: Equally powerful and rich as GS and JPM/Ferrari and Mercedes and once saw major success (dominant M&A franchise/4 world championships in a row)

BAML/Renault: Historically great franchise (Merrill Lynch/Benetton) that was bought out by a large universal bank/carmaker (BofA/Renault). Has seen successes via large balance sheets/virtually unlimited R&D budget but still has work to do in order to challenge the big boys.

Citi/McLaren: Wildly successful in the 80s (Salomon Bros/McLaren-Honda) but went quiet in the 90s before resurging in the 2000s as a completely new brand (Citigroup/McLaren-Mercedes) and saw some success before crashing down (financial crisis/failed partnership w/ Honda). Currently on the path upwards again with new leadership/power units.

DB/Williams: A once-dominant franchise now spiraling downwards with no end in sight due to gross mismanagement from the top (John Cryan/Claire Williams).

Barclays/Sauber: Former powerhouse (Lehman/BMW-Sauber) that exited the biz and got acquired, but has yielded mixed results since and are sort of stuck in the midfield.

Nomura/Toyota: Japanese big-hitters who've spent big in an effort to break in and disrupt the playing field, but yielded mediocre results (low market share/failing to establish as a top 3 constructor) and as a result has (largely) exited the biz (Nomura scaling down US and London operations/Toyota exiting F1 completely).

that's all I can think of so far....any thoughts?

all credits go to the GoT post! great inspiration

EDIT: oh my god guys did not expect all the love - thanks everyone

Comments (54)

Mar 10, 2020

This is so fantastically accurate

    • 1
Mar 10, 2020

Well done

Mar 10, 2020

love this lmao

Array

Mar 10, 2020

Do you watch Drive to Survive on Netflix?

    • 2
Mar 10, 2020

Do you watch it? More like have you watched it I watched that the same day it released

Mar 10, 2020

Yeah I've seen both seasons. Love it. I think it'll be huge for F1 in terms of engaging a broader audience

    • 1
Mar 10, 2020

BAML and DB are amazingly accurate

Mar 11, 2020

I was contemplating whether Renault should be BAML or Credit Suisse (First Boston)

Mar 10, 2020

Does this make Wells Fargo, HAAS or Alpha Tauri?? Great thread and comparison so far! haha

Mar 10, 2020

Wells has to be HAAS. Newcomer who can't stop stepping on their own dicks.

    • 2
Mar 11, 2020

I'd put Wells as Marussia/HRT - newcoming backmarkers who cant seem to find much success

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

Most Helpful
Mar 10, 2020

finally someone in Finance who loves F1 too

Aditya.B

    • 19
Mar 10, 2020

Now do middle market

Array

    • 1
Mar 10, 2020

Very creative. I enjoyed reading this. You should definitely be a writer or consider working in a banking group that covers automobiles.

Array

    • 2
Mar 10, 2020

This is golden literature for my petroleum-soaked heart

Mar 10, 2020

this made me so hard I may date your post

Mar 10, 2020

Dibs broheim

Mar 10, 2020

So... we have a 40 person F1 pick-em every year where you pick each driver once and get the points they get... should we start a pick-em for banks?

Funniest
Mar 10, 2020

Trying to think of something for Racing Point. Getting railed by Vijay during their Force India days and getting bought out of admin by Stroll and now the AM Works team for '21.

Had decent talent with Ocon, good talent with Perez then Lance got the seat thanks to the bailout. Anyone got any idea?

    • 5
Mar 11, 2020

Perhaps someone trying to mimic J.P. Morgan? I mean the Racing Point looks like a pink Mercedes at this point.

Mar 11, 2020

Bear Stearns?

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

Mar 12, 2020

I'll repost my reply here:

RBC/(T)Racing Point: Trying to copy the (business) model of J.P. Morgan/Mercedes but on a much smaller budget. Questionable results thus far. Canadian backing too.

    • 2
Mar 10, 2020

Who is Charles Leclerc at Goldman?

    • 1
Mar 11, 2020

And who is Verstappen at Morgan Stanley?

Mar 11, 2020

Could be Gary Cohn since they both fit in the Chosen One/Golden Child category but he left so idk.

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

    • 1
Mar 11, 2020

Leclerc is that hardo 2nd yr analyst who says "I'm working - need to analyze the data" whenever people ask him what he's up to at any given time. Given an early 2nd year bump to associate though so I am happy for him

Love the guy though - real driving talent.

    • 3
Mar 11, 2020

So is Vettel the guy who made MD before 30 but struggled to win deals ever since?

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

    • 4
Mar 27, 2020
Gandhi10:

Who is Charles Leclerc at Goldman?

Kunal Shah (MD at 27, partner at 31)

Mar 11, 2020

Extremely well done. Dirve to survive has gotten my interest in F1 and I'm going to try to pay attention during this upcoming season.

Mar 12, 2020

RIP no upcoming season thanks to Coronavirus

Aditya.B

Mar 12, 2020

Season 3 gonna be interesting...

Mar 11, 2020

Can also see some parallels between banning the glorious V10/V12 engines and the Volcker rule.

    • 4
Mar 11, 2020

Superb point

Mar 11, 2020

anyone up for a Fantasy F1 WSO

    • 4
Mar 11, 2020

Fuck yes let's get it poppin'

Mar 11, 2020

seriously tho, let's make it happen

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

Mar 11, 2020

all middle market operations are F2 teams and the regional banks are NASCAR

Aditya.B

Mar 11, 2020

Just chef's kiss

Mar 11, 2020

This was spot on. Love it

Array

    • 1
Mar 11, 2020

Agree with most of what is said, but would still place MS above JPM

    • 3
Mar 11, 2020

ahahhahaa not gonna lie I struggled with MS/Red Bull

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

Mar 12, 2020

So that leaves Credit Swiss and UBS as Toro Rosso and Haas.
FYI, its Alfa romeo racing instead of Sauber now..

Mar 12, 2020

lol yeah I'm aware of the rebranding but the team is best known as Sauber and longtime fans usually call it as such

also I dont think CS and UBS are necessarily Toro Rosso and Haas. There's a reason I left them out - literally could not draw parallels between the 2 banks and f1 teams (past & present)

"Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin' have any." - Boiler Room

Mar 12, 2020

Especially since the dude corrected you about Sauber and still stated Toro Rosso as such, not Alpha Tauri ... hahaha

Mar 12, 2020

Spot on. Well done.

...

Mar 12, 2020

RBC/(T)Racing Point: Trying to copy the (business) model of J.P. Morgan/Mercedes but on a much smaller budget. Questionable results thus far. Canadian backing too.

Unicredit/Alpha Tauri: The weird, plucky Italian version of Morgan Stanley/Red Bull. Just happy to be on a tombstone/at a GP.

Centerview (or any other EB)/Haas: Started out of the gate strong after pulling a bunch of talent with GS/Ferrari pedigree. How well they succeed without a balance sheet/big budget is an open question.

On another note. Given Ferrari's ability to always screw up a championship due to bad cars/internal politics, they might even warrant the DB moniker. Especially seeing as they haven't won anything since 2008.

    • 2
Mar 12, 2020

Pretty solid. Would say Greenhill is a solid parallel to Haas. Bit of a decline but always teetering on the "this might be their inflection point" kind of vibe.

Mar 13, 2020

This is frickin hilarious and everything is on point lol
(From a huge tifosi as you can tell from my profile pic)

Mar 14, 2020

Awesome. I see there is a lot of us F1 fans on WSO.

Mar 16, 2020
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