As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.
Sometimes I like to take a dump in the shower and squish the turds between my toes, watching as they dissolve into filthy brown water. It's a metaphor for the transience of human existence. If you think about it, we're not so very different than those turds. We live, we laugh, and ultimately, we die, and turn into shit. And then we're nothing at all.
Sometimes I like to take a dump in the shower and squish the turds between my toes, watching as they dissolve into filthy brown water. It's a metaphor for the transience of human existence. If you think about it, we're not so very different than those turds. We live, we laugh, and ultimately, we die, and turn into shit. And then we're nothing at all.
Is the bottom of your tub caked with turd residue? Kind of like little tombstones?
I have six Lickitungs (max pokemon you can have on yourself at once is 6 in case you didn't know) - pretty weird though, no trainer seems to want to battle me...
1 If my hair is a little puffy in the morning, sometimes I just put on a hat.
2 I use a ruler to trim my chinstrap. I am trying to find one small enough that has a leveler.
3 I spend about 15 minutes a day working out. I devote about 5 minutes to warming up and weight lifting. I spend the rest of the time watching Rambo or something similar.
4 I bring food with me wherever I go because fast food is not fast enough and I eat about every 2 hours.
5 I am switching to a manicured style beard because I don't want anyone to think I am a hippy (I hate hippies).
6 I hate text messages. If I get one I just ignore it.
7 I hate social media. If something I do is not important to be on the front page of the paper why should I brag about it myself?
8 My favorite workout when I am travailing is pushups. I can do a thousand of them now.
9 I like just about all types of music except for the most popular varies. I might be listening to The Police or The Cars then switch to FFDP or AC/DC.
"He that hath a beard is more than a youth, and he that hath no beard is less than a man." ― William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing
I arrange my skittles/m&m's by color and number. I eat them until I have an even number of each, unless there is only one of a particular color, and then I eat that first.
I count license plates from different states whenever I am walking somewhere and there are cars around me. Once on my college campus from the parking lot to the school, I counted 39 different states and at least 1 Canadian territory.
My friend is really eccentric - a bit older but he's had this morning routine for the past few years. Never deviates from it either, which is a little weird...he has great skin though and works out. Good looking chap, well off, and takes care of himself. I think I might copy his style, but anyways...he basically does the following:
-In the morning if his face is a little puffy, he'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. He can do ~1000 now.
-After he removes the ice pack he uses a deep pore cleanser lotion.
-In the shower he uses a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub.
-He then applies an herb-mint facial mask which he leaves on for 10 minutes while he prepares the rest of his routine.
Oh, and also, he always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because he states that alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.
-Finally, he uses moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.
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Sometimes when I'm all alone I'll strip down, cover myself in vaseline, lay on the floor and pretend I'm a slug.
Well, I was going to think of something witty to write, but, I don't think I'm going to top that one, so I'll just be honest.
The weirdest thing I do isn't even all that weird. I fap to female Muppets. I call it fuppeting.
I rofl'd.
In case it's unclear to anyone...this is plagiarized.
Still funny though.
Does public masturbation count?
I drink cranberry juice straight up at the bar
People always think I do it because of The Departed, but it really it's cause it's nutritious as hell.
And because of The Departed
As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.
Sometimes I like to take a dump in the shower and squish the turds between my toes, watching as they dissolve into filthy brown water. It's a metaphor for the transience of human existence. If you think about it, we're not so very different than those turds. We live, we laugh, and ultimately, we die, and turn into shit. And then we're nothing at all.
Is the bottom of your tub caked with turd residue? Kind of like little tombstones?
I give people the benefit of the doubt. Pretty crazy.. I know.
Hahaha this thread is so disturbing.
I have six Lickitungs (max pokemon you can have on yourself at once is 6 in case you didn't know) - pretty weird though, no trainer seems to want to battle me...
I like to do hoodrat things.
I have a friend who smokes real cigarettes
I wear argyle socks. Everyday.
I arrange my skittles/m&m's by color and number. I eat them until I have an even number of each, unless there is only one of a particular color, and then I eat that first.
I count license plates from different states whenever I am walking somewhere and there are cars around me. Once on my college campus from the parking lot to the school, I counted 39 different states and at least 1 Canadian territory.
My friend is really eccentric - a bit older but he's had this morning routine for the past few years. Never deviates from it either, which is a little weird...he has great skin though and works out. Good looking chap, well off, and takes care of himself. I think I might copy his style, but anyways...he basically does the following:
-In the morning if his face is a little puffy, he'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. He can do ~1000 now. -After he removes the ice pack he uses a deep pore cleanser lotion. -In the shower he uses a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. -He then applies an herb-mint facial mask which he leaves on for 10 minutes while he prepares the rest of his routine.
Oh, and also, he always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because he states that alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.
-Finally, he uses moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.
Very interesting routine, no?
Alias dolorem asperiores officia voluptas qui saepe vitae. Minima enim ex tempore architecto delectus qui. Harum nisi nulla mollitia blanditiis in tempora.
Consequatur in error esse nisi architecto. Voluptatem vero facere minima et consequatur corrupti exercitationem et.
Quaerat ut nobis molestias est consequuntur aut. Unde aut minus est molestiae aliquam ut. Assumenda dolores eius praesentium sint quasi fugiat.
Magnam ea accusamus aut nihil et corporis. Debitis reiciendis dolor quisquam. Fugiat rerum repellat occaecati omnis.
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Dolore tempore doloribus et soluta assumenda est ut id. Maxime architecto voluptatem et voluptatem qui et minus. Asperiores repellendus eos maiores et.
Cumque optio quia corporis est adipisci omnis. Reiciendis voluptatem omnis nulla ut consequatur explicabo. Ut assumenda facilis maxime doloribus. Possimus consequuntur et aut accusantium dolor aliquam.
Rerum cumque soluta nihil itaque. Molestias reiciendis vero modi ullam inventore. Non non voluptatum atque quis.
Est illo molestiae fuga rerum. Voluptatem occaecati quis rerum autem sit. Ut iure aliquid culpa delectus. Qui velit veniam sed et. Qui sed atque ut dolorem hic. Cum soluta id nemo earum esse quia.