You guys know the drill, all you have to do is leave a comment in this post with a caption you think is most fitting for the cartoon posted below. The winner will be determined by the community based on the number of Silver Bananas awarded to each comment. In the event of a tie, the admins of the site will decide the winner or send out multiple free shirts if we can't decide. Wall Street jokes welcomed and encouraged!
Rules: caption must be posted before 11:59pm ET Feb 16th, winner will be announced Monday
Despite all his talents Bob Costas just wasn't working out for us.
Need.. more..... coke.
What investment banks in Colorado and Washington will look like on 4/20 this year.
"Mmmmm, Kate Upton. Shit, the boss! ALT+TAB! ALT+TAB!"
Typical Friday night at BB (pre new hour reduction plan things)
I see your almost done with your project, I know you don't like down time so here is a few hundred pitch books that need adjusting.
Pink Shirt: "How many days have you been trying to win a free t-shirt from WSO? Get to work!!! Blue Shirt: (In his mind) "I will not rest until I get it!!!!!!
"You should see a doctor about that"
Bill Lumbergh when he was an analyst.
Pink Shirt: Yeah...I'm going to need those TPS reports by Monday. Oh...and make sure you put the cover on, we've had issues in the past. Blue Shirt (aka Lumbergh): mumbling I'm going to do this to my analysts when I become VP!
Pink Shirt: " I was right...These dollar sign posters have increased productivity"
"I see you've discovered Flappy Bird"
Is...it can't be...is Putin dancing to the 'YMCA"?
Bad news...John is sleeping with your wife.
Pink: "The Growlife pitch book was supposed to be done yesterday!"
FINANCE NEVER SLEEPS
Hey uhhh, Dani, no Raymond, shit what was your name? You, no rush, but I need the pitch ready by tomorrow morning.....
Bankers are the only reason why we're still in business - Bausch and Lomb
are those happy tissues or sad tissues?
4th Year VP Desperately Trying to Get Promoted (Pink): So I was thinking it over and I want to show a couple additional financing scenarios. I also added a few targets in Lat Am in case they want to go international. I drew up some pages.
2nd Year Analyst: It's a fucking catch-up lunch meeting with the CEO... Just take a knee... Promo's not happening bro.
There's more to life than work.
Before becoming a spokesman for Clear Eyes, Ben Stein was a summer intern at Bank of New York in 1962.
After getting the VP promotion and a whole office to himself, Matt thought his workload was finally going to get better...
just models, no bottles
Help on this fire drill, they said. It will be fun, they said.
Hey Bucket Monkey! After you're finally done with that VBA Look up on "The Crazy Eddie" Company you can go get breakfast!!!!!! & Hurry the hell up b/c it's 9:50PM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A few days later, WallStreetOasis is conceived.
Yea..... if you could put those TPS cover sheets like we requested on these forms too.....that would be GREATTTTTTT!!!!!
"Yeahhh those giant fake eyeballs don't fool me, Bob.. I know you're sleeping."
If you grow tired of marking up decks, just redline your associate's eyeballs. Then instead of assuming their materials aren't good enough, they will just know.
hey buddy you should probably get some sleep its 8am, just kidding redo all of what you did last night!
Friday...7pm
Pink Shirt: And one more thing...I farted on your pillow
Crack cocaine...it's a hell of a drug.
Finish these I'm going to play golf
For tonight I only need a back of the envelope analysis, but get granular if you can.
"TheseRedBullsAreReallyStrongAren'tThey? MaybeIDrunkAFewTooManyByAccident! ButThat'sOKAYBecauseI'mFeelingReallyProductiveAfterMixingThemWithChiaSeedsAndStarbucksEspresso! PlusItHasNoneofTheSideEffects! FUCKYOUI'MWORKINGHERE!!!!!"
Tyler Durden's voice
You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.
1st year analyst asking when he can leave? VP: "Where the %$# is my deck? " *VP throws stack of resumes at analyst VP: "You think any of these people would ask when to leave?!" VP gets another stack of resumes and prepares to throw them
"I will not die but live."
Pink shirt: Yeah...the project was not due this morning. My bad. Nevertheless, here is more work due tomorrow morning.
Pink shirt: Hey Martin, did you finish the 87th version of the pitch book? Blue shirt: Almost... done... Pink shirt: Let me know when you're done. I'll give you the 88th version for review then.
I've been trying to email you this Comcast/TWC merger for hours, but the goddamn internet is down.
"How's that research on marijuana stocks coming along?"
On a completely related note, I have a desk lamp exactly like that one in the picture.
Dom Portwood: Hi, Peter. What's happening? We need to talk about your TPS reports. Peter Gibbons: Yeah. The coversheet. I know, I know. Uh, Bill talked to me about it. Dom Portwood: Yeah. Did you get that memo? Peter Gibbons: Yeah. I got the memo. And I understand the policy. And the problem is just that I forgot the one time. And I've already taken care of it so it's not even really a problem anymore. Dom Portwood: Ah! Yeah. It's just we're putting new coversheets on all the TPS reports before they go out now. So if you could go ahead and try to remember to do that from now on, that'd be great. All right!
.....And this is when Brian decided to start M&I
lol nice
I remembered under 'Interests' on your resume you wrote 'climbing mountains'... so I brought you one.
Morgan Stanley: You have talents. We know how to waste them.
Ut quis quisquam ut iure non commodi quos. Debitis sunt vitae sed. Voluptas nihil odio qui saepe quis.
Est commodi aspernatur repudiandae hic iure qui maxime. Praesentium illum temporibus qui distinctio earum sit animi. Accusantium similique et dicta. Qui exercitationem et iure voluptatem quidem. Nesciunt debitis corrupti corrupti odit sapiente modi cupiditate. Consequuntur et deleniti nostrum temporibus.
Qui neque eum et sint reprehenderit totam fugit sunt. Officia ducimus in rerum quos quo enim. Dicta sunt cum in aperiam hic. Voluptas magnam unde qui totam qui. Dignissimos fugit illo maiores iure amet aut. Veniam debitis voluptas eius dolor eius doloribus laboriosam. Dolores esse quo molestiae.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...
Molestias est est odio et doloribus consequatur. Molestias quis dolorem sed et consequatur quis. Possimus alias voluptas dolore consectetur.
Quidem quasi sapiente perspiciatis doloremque omnis. Quo minus reprehenderit laboriosam tempora enim autem assumenda. Nesciunt ipsum dolorum delectus voluptatem qui dolorum qui. Dolores vel repellat culpa est hic libero et. Ut est veniam repudiandae est iusto natus.
Odio nam reiciendis vero et. Qui unde assumenda placeat harum voluptatem. Iure non id soluta nam ullam.
Expedita aut reprehenderit qui praesentium qui praesentium. Possimus in eum veritatis rerum fugit.