Respectable way to bow out of a process after final round

Ignore title, am slightly more senior than ASO2. I recently had a superday; the firm has not gotten back to me, and they said they would mid last week, so it is likely I got dinged. I am ok with this and am interviewing with a few other firms I am more excited about (e.g., would decline the offer if received so that I can continue to interview with other firms).

While I get the hint, I would rather not end with a ghosting or being waitlisted, because it is nearly certain I bump into a number of the folks I interviewed with in the future (we are in a small-world market) and I want to be graceful about this process. Perhaps too it is an ego preservation move to be the one that cuts the cord.

My thinking is that I should send a note to the internal recruiting point of contact thanking them again for putting me through the process and letting them know that I plan to move forward with other opportunities. After tying a bow on the process there, I plan to email a few of the people I met who I will likely stay in touch with / bump in to, so as to leave a positive impression prior to future interactions

Is this proper etiquette given my goals? How would you do this differently? Thank you.

Comments (6)

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Mr_Agree_to_Disagree, what's your opinion? Comment below:

I agree with the idea to just let it go and don't say anything. I get that you're thinking you're trying to motivate yourself as being professional. Not to mention you said you're more interested in certain other firms/positions anyways and would decline if you had any positive traction with those others. Ghosting sucks, but let's chalk that behavior up for what it is: high school level insecurities and lack of respect and that's all I'll say about my opinions on HR and recruiters (but respect to you HFPM if you really do actually get back to everyone. Even if it's not always going to be sunshine and roses but at least some sort of answer. We need more professionals like that).

I'd go ahead and keep working on the other opportunities. If this firm finally gets back to you after you've accepted something else (or even if unfortunately you haven't hit that yet but feel something is going somewhere), just let them know the simple truth. You weren't receiving any feedback so you had to consider your own best interest and move on. And leave it at that. Don't let yourself put your foot in your mouth trying to over explain something out of some kind of guilt or embarassment. Focus that energy on work product and CE or even healthy personal stuff that makes you a stronger candidate instead.

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