BREAKING - Uncle Fatty the macaque has been detained by Thai authorities and sentenced to an at this time undefined period of time in fat camp. The gluttonous primate saw his weight skyrocket from 17lb to 33lb in an attempt to cope with the increased responsibility recently placed on him by the macaque community. Anonymous sources close to Uncle Fatty say rocky divorce proceedings and alleged illicit drug abuse may have also catalyzed his stress-driven binge. More on this from the Daily Mail.
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