Am I Too Good Looking To Be A Banker??

Hi everyone!

I am a rising junior at a target school. I was wondering if I'm too good looking to be in investment banking. It all started a couple weeks ago at my internship with Goldman, a local Jewish owned deli, not the bank. The owner wanted to take the interns out to dinner, with his wife, at Red Lobster, so of course we wore business professional. We were having a great conversation until I noticed the owner's wife was licking her lips at me. Let me tell you dudes, she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot. Unfortunately, the owner also noticed his wife doing this and I was terminated immediately.

This hasn't been the first time I have paid for my cursed good looks. Whenever I walk into a public setting, all of the females always stare at me and undress me with their eyes. Girls say I'm a mix between Beckham/Pitt/Shia Labeouf. My stats are below:

Height - 6'2" Chest - 43" (pumped) Arms - 15.25" (relaxed) 8 pak abs (I do crossfit)

Needless to say, you can see why girls are distracted by my greekesque figure. However, I'm concerned. I want to be a banker, all my life, and I'm afraid my coworkers/management will be jealous of my ridiculously good looks and not allow me to be the all-star banker I know I can be. I'm also concerned I will distract all of the women on my floor, affecting the bank's bottom line. Help!

43 Comments
 

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Disclaimer for the Kids: Any forward-looking statements are solely for informational purposes and cannot be taken as investment advice. Consult your moms before deciding where to invest.
 

LOL at the tags! too good looking to be a banker? give me a break! what next, too young for McDonalds?

Pets forever-We can help we stuff your pet so you can have them forever. Coming soon, grandparents forever-- Vice City
 
Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

Hahaha. Glad some one else remembers Johnny Bravo other than me.

OP, what race are you?

 
Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

Don't compare my ex to Johnny Bravo please.

 
Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

On what planet is a 0 an average waist?

MM IB -> Corporate Development -> Strategic Finance
 
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Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

On what planet is a 0 an average waist?

Sorry, I forget not everyone socialises only with college students. It's pretty average for someone who's meant to have a body like a model...

 
Aimez
SECfinance
Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

On what planet is a 0 an average waist?

Sorry, I forget not everyone socialises only with college students. It's pretty average for someone who's meant to have a body like a model...

Even for college students, 0 is not average. 2 is probably pushing it unless you're only hanging out with blonde sluts.

MM IB -> Corporate Development -> Strategic Finance
 
Best Response
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Aimez
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Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

On what planet is a 0 an average waist?

Sorry, I forget not everyone socialises only with college students. It's pretty average for someone who's meant to have a body like a model...

Even for college students, 0 is not average. 2 is probably pushing it unless you're only hanging out with blonde sluts.

Okay... Either people at my uni are a lot thinner than most average college students, or I'm under-estimating the sizes of most of my friends based on a presumption that that most of them are a similar size to myself.

I know a lot of my asian friends were thinner than most. Over 50% of my classes are asians, indian, from the middle east, or european, so I'm not seeing a typical Australian distribution in my classes, I guess. However, I never thought "Blondes sluts" were the thin ones of the lot, they usually tend to be on average a little bit larger than the rest.

In America, does being a slut with blonde hair make you thinner? Because I didn't see the correlation between sexual liberation and hair colour and weight... well, not in a great extent.

If it helps, I didn't think I've ever seen a morbidly obese person on my university campus. I don't see anyone I would have defined as "Fat" aside from some mature age students and one or two of the lecturers. So maybe I am under-estimating a little, but seriously, everyone seems to pretty evenly distributed around my own size, for every friend I have who is a little larger than me, I seem to have another a bit smaller than me. However, I may have a confirmation bias, I'll concede that.

 

o..m..g. you can't be too hot to be a banker lol ur dum. in fact many movie star and abercrombie models are ex-goldmen sachs TMT ibankers (mainly cus of the prestige). and u BETTER not be distracting any workers cus invesment bankers are serous people and its seirous work time when you get to the office.

and u wore business profesionel to red lobster LOL WOW u r so dum you will never make it to invesment banker. u will always be a sandwich boi who will never be smart or serous enough to be a ibanker

 
Blalocko..m..g. you can't be too hot to be a banker lol ur dum. in fact many movie star and abercrombie models are ex-goldmen sachs TMT ibankers (mainly cus of the prestige). and u BETTER not be distracting any workers cus invesment bankers are serous people and its seirous work time when you get to the office.

and u wore business profesionel to red lobster LOL WOW u r so dum you will never make it to invesment banker. u will always be a sandwich boi who will never be smart or serous enough to be a ibanker

You sound real smart
 
Aimez
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Aimez
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Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

On what planet is a 0 an average waist?

Sorry, I forget not everyone socialises only with college students. It's pretty average for someone who's meant to have a body like a model...

Even for college students, 0 is not average. 2 is probably pushing it unless you're only hanging out with blonde sluts.

Okay... Either people at my uni are a lot thinner than most average college students, or I'm under-estimating the sizes of most of my friends based on a presumption that that most of them are a similar size to myself.

I know a lot of my asian friends were thinner than most. Over 50% of my classes are asians, indian, from the middle east, or european, so I'm not seeing a typical Australian distribution in my classes, I guess. However, I never thought "Blondes sluts" were the thin ones of the lot, they usually tend to be on average a little bit larger than the rest.

In America, does being a slut with blonde hair make you thinner? Because I didn't see the correlation between sexual liberation and hair colour and weight... well, not in a great extent.

If it helps, I didn't think I've ever seen a morbidly obese person on my university campus. I don't see anyone I would have defined as "Fat" aside from some mature age students and one or two of the lecturers. So maybe I am under-estimating a little, but seriously, everyone seems to pretty evenly distributed around my own size, for every friend I have who is a little larger than me, I seem to have another a bit smaller than me. However, I may have a confirmation bias, I'll concede that.

I think you’re underestimating most of your friends’ sizes and/or suffering from confirmation bias. “Blonde sluts” is a stereotype portraying a super skinny girl with big tits. No real correlation, just a phrase.

Like you said, college students are not representative of the general population. Also, you said the boobs are “only” a D. Seems a little messed up to me.

MM IB -> Corporate Development -> Strategic Finance
 
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Aimez
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Aimez
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Aimez
SnappinNecksAndCashinChecks she was hot, like 36D-25-29 hot.

They are some messed up statistics. That's a pretty average waist (size 0), No hips at all, and a massively broad upper back, plus the boobs are only a D.

I think that's not a girl, dude, she's got stats like Johnny Bravo.

On what planet is a 0 an average waist?

Sorry, I forget not everyone socialises only with college students. It's pretty average for someone who's meant to have a body like a model...

Even for college students, 0 is not average. 2 is probably pushing it unless you're only hanging out with blonde sluts.

Okay... Either people at my uni are a lot thinner than most average college students, or I'm under-estimating the sizes of most of my friends based on a presumption that that most of them are a similar size to myself.

I know a lot of my asian friends were thinner than most. Over 50% of my classes are asians, indian, from the middle east, or european, so I'm not seeing a typical Australian distribution in my classes, I guess. However, I never thought "Blondes sluts" were the thin ones of the lot, they usually tend to be on average a little bit larger than the rest.

In America, does being a slut with blonde hair make you thinner? Because I didn't see the correlation between sexual liberation and hair colour and weight... well, not in a great extent.

If it helps, I didn't think I've ever seen a morbidly obese person on my university campus. I don't see anyone I would have defined as "Fat" aside from some mature age students and one or two of the lecturers. So maybe I am under-estimating a little, but seriously, everyone seems to pretty evenly distributed around my own size, for every friend I have who is a little larger than me, I seem to have another a bit smaller than me. However, I may have a confirmation bias, I'll concede that.

I think you’re underestimating most of your friends’ sizes and/or suffering from confirmation bias. “Blonde sluts” is a stereotype portraying a super skinny girl with big tits. No real correlation, just a phrase.

Like you said, college students are not representative of the general population. Also, you said the boobs are “only” a D. Seems a little messed up to me.

For an 11 inch difference between the waist and the back, I'd expect larger breasts and a smaller back measurement, given there girl allegedly has no hips and therefore not much fat retention (which means her breasts might be, though are not guaranteed to be fake, depending on her age and whether she has had kids previously). This means the waist size is surprisingly wide (if her hip measurement is right, then she should be about a 22 inch waist, which is extreme and generally not naturally occuring), but I'll live with it. The cup size is based on the difference between the ribs (taken below the bra, and then on top of the bra at the nipple level), and for such a dramatically inverted triangle shaped girl, it seems strange that she would only have 6-7 inches of breast tissue. I'm suspecting based on her waist measurement she would be more like a 34-DD (Same size volume of breasts, smaller back) or 32-E (again, same size breasts in volume, but a narrower back). That said, her hip measurements are really messed up, which throws the equation out. In modeling and dressmaking, the hip measurement is taken at the widest part of the body (not the true hip but the derriere), and to have such a small hip measurement with such a wide waist and back isn't viable.

 

Size 0 is pretty rare for any female over the age of 15. A girl who is size 0 who is the right height could probably start modeling in most places outside of NYC and Los Angeles. I definitely think you are underestimating their sizes.

My girlfriend in high school was a size 0 and even in high school it was a rare commodity.

Array
 
Virginia Tech 4everSize 0 is pretty rare for any female over the age of 15. A girl who is size 0 who is the right height could probably start modeling in most places outside of NYC and Los Angeles. I definitely think you are underestimating their sizes.

My girlfriend in high school was a size 0 and even in high school it was a rare commodity.

Agreed, my girlfriend is a 0 and she is tiny.

MM IB -> Corporate Development -> Strategic Finance
 

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