I can’t be Alone on This
First two weeks into the summer and the internship is all it’s cracked up to be, besides one small thing. Really liking and getting along with my intern class but man some of them need to calm it with the “banker talk”.“Bro I’m getting slammed rn, my analyst needs this deck by EOD and the staffer just unloaded on me”. Buddy you’re pushing images around a Powerpoint calm down.
Again, loving it but I’m cringing half the day at some of the things I hear… and I’m an intern.
The devil is in the details. Real high-level stuff. How many cooks are in the kitchen? Have you been drinking from the firehose?
Don’t you know he’s jammed right now? The staffer teed this up for him after he gave him some color on his bandwidth. He should run this up the flagpole and make sure to hit the alligator closest to canoe, BUT make sure not to boil the ocean as he’s blocking and tackling while simultaneously Monday morning quarterbacking. He’s definitively cutting the lawn with scissors right now and going to be burning the midnight oil on this one because there’s a lot of wood to chop, being mindful if any snakes that come out of the woodpile, unless he starts cooking with gas. He will need to get the 1000 foot view first so he doesn’t get over his skis. He can’t wait to be pencils down.
Sit back, relax and feel the jargon wash over you.
Nah but for real, did you really expect the hardos in your intern class at a BANK not to utilise banker talk? They're probably just excited, leave them be.
If you don't like banker talk go be a consultant
truly would rather pass away before doing that
Consultant talk isn’t much better 😂
consultant talk is different and somehow worse
Any brief quips on what consultant talk sounds like?
No one I know who talked like that got a return offer.
See that Guggenheim tiktok intern guy ("the macros on these salad wraps go hard")
Lol it’s a phase man. Everyone starts out using the classic lingo and then gets sick of it. Most end up kind of hating it or at least clowning on people that use it unironically past a certain point. You better get used to it though, because there will always be people in banking that use it.
You see this in other industries too lol. It's a common human fallacy
Ah something else that really bothers me, people who don't know what the word fallacy means.
We’re death wrestling with ogres here, Shiv
welcome to corporate world!
Monkey see, monkey do; monkey pee, monkey poo.
I remember during my internship, HR called offer/ no offer day “D-Day”…..
yeah bud it’s totally comparable…..
1/3 of landing troops on certain beaches were wounded or killed and they’re calling internship conversions D-Day :|
Was the return offer rate ~66%? If so then TOTALLY comparable.
Hahaha let them be. A lot of people probably worked their asses off to get there and are proud about finally being a banker.
It’ll wear off very fast… No one actually says that shit after 6 months full time
Me and my best friends had the same attitude in college. Almost no work talk, when we hang jargon doesn’t mean shit we all work and could care less. I can say I’d rather have a guy like you join the team full time than a hardo who makes the role their whole personality.
I’m assuming you’re also capable and hard worker for being offered a role, not sure of the culture but people will notice you’re a better hang and not a hardo and like that all else equal unless you’re with a drink the kool aid group in which case you don’t want that anyway in my op. Good luck dude just work hard and be yourself 👍
HAHAHA bro this is fucking hilarious
it's a classic, we play it for all the new analysts when they join
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