Impostor Syndrome

AN1 that started on the desk a month ago -

I’m not sure if it’s because I don’t see what everyone else in my analyst class is doing, or because it’s a really competitive environment, or because feedback isn’t crystal clear all the time, or whatever else - but I’ve always had this consistently disproven insecurity that I’m the dumbo in my analyst class. I try my best, I make mistakes, and try to soak in all that I can - but I still beat myself up over it and assume that these are unforgivable mistakes, that every other AN1 (or intern when I was an intern last summer) must be far ahead of me and preferred by those above me.

Yet, to my complete surprise, I’m consistently praised: I got practically no negative feedback last summer, and even just two weeks into AN1, I’m being told by those above me I’ve been such a help and carried on the deal (I’ve done nothing). Is this normal - I feel like I know nothing and have done nothing, yet I’m treated like a star sometimes?

7 Comments
 

If by “nepo hire” you mean parents came to the US with nothing more than a few dollars in their pocket, worked their ass of to put their kid in a position to steal your kid’s sacred IB job - then yes, “nepo hire”

 
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In an era where analyst classes are huge, college is dumbed down and hiring emphasizes “technical skills” vs classical education, most analysts hired out of campus recruiting are pretty mediocre. It doesn’t take a lot to stand out so I wouldn’t be surprised and I wouldn’t assume the rest of the lot have any clue. 

 

OP here - not sure if those commenting are just ignorant or dumb, but I’m a white guy with no connections to finance whatsoever that worked hard to get my IB role. I’m as far from DEI as you get.

My point is not that I suck at this job, because clearly I don’t based on the feedback I’ve received. My point is that my own gauge for how I’m doing at this job is completely inaccurate and muddied by insecurity. How do I fix those goalposts so I’m not as anxious all the time regarding my performance?

 

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