Left Lane Associates is Paradise

Disclaimer: OG hit post was taken down, resurfacing this beauty I found off the WSO IG page.

7:27 am: You board the lakeshore east go train line from Oshawa, sighing as you prepare for another 1 hour and 45 minute commute to the office in Etobicoke. Life is good you think to yourself. After all, you are an Investment Banker; Not to mention, at the top supply chain m&a boutique in Canada. Your ultra-target background (think Harvard/Wharton/BrockU/Laurier) has taken you so far and you chuckle to yourself as scrubs from semi-targets (think Ivey/Queens) barely place at Big 5.

9:15 am: You arrive at the office and begin to set up your Macbook at your desk and catch up on current news, events, and trends in the supply chain industry via Yahoo Finance (We're still negotiating with Capital IQ for a subscription). After 20 minutes, you take a 2 minute walk to the gas station beside the office to purchase a red bull (peach flavoured) and are greeted by the friendly cashier.

11:00 am: After crushing a red bull and chopping it up with the other juniors, you have your only meeting of the day. The client is a asset-based logistics business currently trading at a 1.3x EV/ Revenue multiple and a net income-margin of 8% who has expressed interest in selling. You begin drafting up marketing materials, and cook up an absolute beauty of a linkedin post to gage potential buyers. You get an impressive 7 likes in the first 30 minutes of posting.

2:32 pm: After taking a 2 hour lunch and deleting 3 mcdoubles and a large fries over some chats about football and the girls you saw clubbing that weekend but didn't approach with the other investment bankers, you do your daily scroll of WSO to see what's up in the community. You come across a post titled "Does anyone have insight on left lane associates" in the recently active discussions thread and excitement runs through your veins. Did my firm just get mentioned on WSO?

You immediately open the thread and begin reading the comments to hear what other bankers on bay street think of you. Your office may be in Etobicoke, but the President has assured you within the next 3 years you'll be at CIBC Square with the big hitters. Your time is coming you think to yourself. As you scroll deeper, you come across a rather sly comment by the user "Ari.Gold", shitting on the location and deal flow at your esteemed institution. He's must of been one of the kids who couldn't get an interview for our highly sought after summer program (we had over 12 applicants this year). After dropping a slightly altered version of the truth for a review (you claimed you make street base with a respectable bonus) to defend your Investment bank, you log off WSO for the day and update your Macbook.

3:48 pm: After prospecting potential buyers in the supply chain space, you fire up linkedin and continue networking elsewhere. You've been at Left Lane for over a year now, and want to lateral to avoid being pigeon holed. You spend the next hour sending out over 300 linkedin requests to every investment bank not named Left Lane Associates in Canada before signing off for the day.

5:00 pm: It is now time to sign off as there are no live deals in the foreseeable future, and you head back to the go station (12 minute walk) for another grueling commute. During your train ride, you take comfort in knowing that the opportunities are endless because your colleague successfully exited to Jeffries' new Toronto office and will get your foot in the door when he earns his bones. It is now 7:04 pm, and after a long day of pretending to be busy and clicking through tabs on your Macbook you wind down. You call your mom and apologize for not speaking to her for 3 weeks. After all, you're an investment banker at the investment bank. She understands and invites you over for dinner the following Sunday. You mention you quite like that and will attend so long as there isn't a fire drill (there hasn't been once since you started). You crack open a beer and smile at yourself in the mirror.

Left Lane Associates is Paradise.