So I just wanted to ask for opinions about this one, idk if it sounds too: "give me an internship please". It is for any finance-related internship, doesn't have to be IB. I tailor it a little for different people but this is generally the idea. Success rate: 30%. Thanks beforehand for your feedback.
Dear xxx,
Sorry for messaging you randomly but I am interested in xx and your profile stood out to me and I would love to speak to you about your experience in the industry. I wondered if you knew about any internship opportunities regarding xx in (city) as I am highly motivated to learn more about the xxx (business).
Thank you
I believe it's in the word count limit
Why are you apologizing before you even say anything? Maybe try to make a connection with the person to give a better reason for reaching out.
This is the message/note I send when sending someone a connection request. I apologize just to be polite because I don't know them, the only thing in common we have is the place we come from.
never apologize when you have nothing to be sorry for
Okay, thank you for your feedback. I will take it off then
Why is the first thing you are saying is that your sorry???Be confident in yourself man. That's an instant red-flag if you apologize for being alive. You gotta be a good-getter. Also, don't flat out ask about opportunities. If I were you, I would ask for a quick 15/20 zoom/phone call and at the end briefly mention it.You got this.P.S don’t say highly motivated, honestly cringe AF
Thank you for your feedback man, seriously. Appreciate it. Ps would give you banan but i don't have apparently :(
Know everyone is harping on you for apologizing (which I do agree) instead of that change it to something along the lines of "Thank you for taking the time to read my message". You're changing the tone from something neutral/negative to something positive which gives off a better impression
Thank you
Linkden doesn’t have enough characters for that man
"Thank you for your time" isn't that hard to shorten it
Lose the whole “your profile stood out” etc. It comes off as fake. Everyone knows that you’re looking for a job and that’s fine. People are willing to chat. If you have something in common (school), mention that, otherwise get straight to it.
Yeah fr,
I just mention it the certain connection I have with the person and ask for a quick 15-20 minute network call.
Voluptas iusto illo corrupti impedit harum cupiditate ut. Eum ducimus sit deleniti nisi ut. Et blanditiis nesciunt molestiae. Ut voluptas enim animi doloribus.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...