more cover letter advice

I am in the process of re-writing my cover letter. I had a couple of questions, and would love to get some feedback from you guys.

First of all - the opening. So far what I have been doing is

"I am writing to express my interest in the blah position at your blah institution. I heard of the position through my blah university's recruiting website and immediately realized that the position matched my skills and interests perfectly. I am especially interested in working as a blah in the blah department [this line if I want to show that I've done some research into the position]"

Now I get the feeling that this is an EXTREMELY standard opening paragraph - so either the recruiter just chucks the letter away, or maybe reads on. Do you guys think I should change it? Any suggestions?

2nd Paragraph - Last year, I just wrote about a tech project that I worked on (coz I was only applying for back end jobs), but now I want to integrate some of my leadership stuff AND I want to address my lowish GPA. I've been working in excess of 16 hours a week - and I was wondering if this is an appropriate way to discuss it.

"I realize my GPA might not be up to the hiring standards at blah company. However due to personal financial issues I have been working in excess of 16 hours a week. My GPA has been on a steady incline since my freshmen year and I have managed that while actively participating in various extra-curricular activities on campus." - then I go on to talk about my leadership roles.

3rd Paragraph - last year my 3rd was my closing but this time around I want to address the question - why the switch from engineering to finance. How's this?

"Once while working on a design project in an engineering course, I was required to look into the financial aspects of my design such as production costs and the market's openness to my invention. The experience got me interested in the financial industry and while I stuck to my original field of study I started investing more time learning about financial accounting and the basics of investment banking." blah blah

and then the closing - usual stuff
"Thank you for your time and consideration, I hope to hear from you soon"

please let me know if there are some things I should avoid or include.

Thanks a lot for YOUR time (yeah I'm in that mood now :D)

 

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