How is networking for an introvert?
I’m an undergrad about to start the whole networking phase of recruiting. I’m kind of introverted, meaning I rarely look forward to having conversation with new people. How was networking for fellow introverts? How did you get yourself to build connections with people at firms with just a few phone calls? My strategy right now is to take it easy and let things develop naturally but I’m afraid I will be seen as lacking enthusiasm. Can anyone relate? What are your strategies?
I am an introvert who started getting really good at networking so I can help. Growing up I was always super shy. When I came to college, I also had a tough time making new connections, but I was always funny so I used that as a safety net to fall back on. I also started observing other people who were extroverted. One of my really good friends was always great at talking to people so I picked up some things from him that definitely helped me.
1.) Ask a lot of question to get the other person talking. One thing I noticed and has really helped me was to continue asking someone questions to get them talking about themselves/something that they are interested in. If there is one thing I've learned about bankers, it's that they really love talking about themselves. As you do this, you'll start to find places that you can plug in little anecdotes that correlate with some things that they are talking about.
2.) Sound as curious as possible. When asking questions try to sound as curious as possible (it also helps to have well thought out questions). Even though it's only a phone call, nod your head in agreement (emotions mimic physical environment), say "mhm" "for sure" "definitely" -- everyone loves an agreeable person. Also, smile when you are talking -- this will make you sound happy. If they bring something up that is a little more about their personal life (maybe they bring up that they like to play golf/tennis), ask them more details about this. It shifts the vibe of the conversation from an informational interview about their bank, to a personal call about hobbies/interests and they will remember you better (and like you more) because of this.
3.) Copy their tone/emotions. This one is pretty simple. If they laugh, you laugh. If they sound excited, sound excited as well. If they talk in a soft, thoughtful voice, reply in a soft, thoughtful voice. There is a ton of evidence in relationship science of the power of copying someone's physical and emotional cues.
4.) Don't be nervous. All the people you will network with have been in your place before, and they love helping out prospects. I was scared shitless the first couple of times I had a networking call, but after the first or second one, you get over the hump and it becomes routine. Have a good list of questions about the industry/banking and don't be afraid to ask them questions about what they like to do in their free time/what their favorite thing to do in the city that they live.
Networking is one of the biggest things that will put you above your peers in terms of landing an offer. Make it fun and don't put to much stress on it. In the end, it will be very laid back and the person that you're talking to will do most of the talking. Hope this helps. There are also some really good books on this topic. One that helped me a lot was:
How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
Good luck!
I get weirded out when a student I'm networking with just copies my emotions (i.e. laughs only when I laugh).
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