All my goals involve being the most impressive to others?
After doing some reflecting, I realized my career goals have always been trying to be the most impressive to others. I am curious if anyone else has this issue and has taken concrete steps to solve it / spoken to a psychology professional about it.
Back in college, I thought often that my goal had to be MF PE analyst out of undergrad and then activist fund. Looking back, it is embarrassing how often I thought about how my peers in college would react after I got my offer (instead of considering whether the route was a career I wanted).
I fell short of the goal, but ended up at an EB M&A group that makes students on WSO cream their pants. I got the reactions I wanted from my college peers back then, but it felt predictably hollow (like how you only want stuff you don't have).
The hollowness strangely hasn't changed anything. Now I often feel like I have to be the best analyst in history. I spend my spare time looking through old models to strive to be able to execute entire deals on my own. I also run screens without being asked to source new business so that the MD can just leverage relationships while I handle everything else. Often, I would think about how my peers and superiors at the firm would react if I were the one man tank (the firm usually has one analyst like this every 3-4 years).
Anyone have success breaking out of this and shifting your focus to internal, and how you feel about yourself? I am almost scared to try, because most of my friends and professional acquitances see me as an overachiever even by IB standards. The scary part is how they would react if I one day turned out to be average.
Specifically interested in any plans / steps that have worked for people. Also interested if anyone has feedback from a psychology professional on similar issues.
...........
Editing because I missread the original:
I think the key here is using different goal posts. Nobody’s saying you can’t chase your dreams but the important thing is setting your metrics for achieving these dreams according to things that you have some influence over.
rather than saying, "I want to be the hottest analyst in history who can do anything asked of them faster than anyone else" it may be more useful to look at a task you do a lot (like screening for business) and looking at you you can do it better than you did yesterday. I think people do this less and less as they get older, and I think the difference is striking when you look at people who have been doing it for a while. Some MDs are just light-years ahead of others, and they all talk about that growth mentality.
Just my 2 cents.
Et mollitia et quibusdam autem autem. Aut sapiente adipisci iste pariatur ab corrupti. Voluptates laboriosam doloremque laborum a est ex velit.
Provident et voluptatum numquam omnis vel expedita. Officia quis omnis voluptatum possimus dolore est excepturi dolore. Sed exercitationem recusandae commodi aut enim numquam non ut.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...