ELEVATE your urination experience with WePee!
Hello everyone. My name is Adam Neumann, and I am currently UNEMPLOYED. I need someone to give me some capital for my new company, because Softbank is LAME. I want to ELEVATE THE WORLD's CONSCIOUSNESS with my new company, WePee. Living a conscious life means emptying your bladder proactively and with purpose. My new business model is simple - I am DISRUPTING the existing TOILET ECOSYSTEM with WePee creative spaces. These are not just any toilets, they are how you ELEVATE your bladder and ACHIEVE NIRVANA. I take existing bathroom facilities and FURNISH them with exquisite MILLENNIAL FRIENDLY instagrammable shit. And yes, of course, I am talking about literal shit here. My restrooms are a TEMPLE to the human bladder, and they will ELEVATE your soul by harnessing the power of CRYPTOCURRENCY so your urination is one with the BLOCKCHAIN. With WePee, for the low monthly fee of $795, you will have access to your own private toilet, with 2PLY TOILET PAPER, the good shit, with Masayoshi Son's face on it. I believe WePee has the potential to become the first TRILLION DOLLAR UNICORN, and by that I mean, it will lose one trillion dollars. Fuck cash flow positive, lets be URINE FLOW positive. Invest in WePee - you're literally pissing away money.
I would invest but I just peed so I'm not very liquid at the moment...
Do you plan to expand into India? I hear they may be a good markets for toilets in the next decade.
With international expansion, it's always good to adapt your product to the local market. With that in mind, I am introducing WePee WithTheCows to harness BOVINE SYNERGY.
D E S I G N A T E D
Hi Adam, sorry to hear about your predicament and thanks for sharing on your new venture.
While I am impressed you have got back on your feet so quickly, I am a little surprised in your vast deviation in entrepreneurial philosophy - Wework was designed as part of the rapidly growing sharing economy, and I think that's where your most transferable skills are, apart from money laundering.
I believe I speak for most other VCs when I say we would be much more compelled to take a closer look at your new venture if it revolved around co-sharing toilets. Take this under advisement, and feel free to reach out again when you have fixed your toilet company / ies. Cheers
Thanks for your feedback. We are currently doing the R&D for the next big elevation of consciousness - WePee OnEachOther. I would love to test it out with ELIZABETH HOLMES.
What about an uber for mobile toilets?
I love peeing in a moving vehicle - it aligns my chakras and unites my cosmic spirit energy
Explains the smell in a SF bus
I would do it but I prefer the golden fountain
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