Explain to someone who barely passed all his finance and econ courses in undergrad something

Why the fuck aren't more underwriters for IPOs/DPOs making companies go public for absolutely criminal valuations (I'm talking an unemployed virgin dropshipping airpod cases out of his dad's garage being valued at 15 bil). I've never seen an example of a IPO/DPO NOT selling, because if some greedy cocksucker wants to short your shares, some other poor fuck's gotta buy your shares in the first place. Equity markets are incredibly liquid and full of activity in most developed countries, so what's stopping me from finding an underwriter willing to help me IPO my airpod cases dropshipping business for 15 bil, making me filthy rich and forcing other losers to buy my overpriced shares so they can lend them out for people to short?

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You won't find an underwriter and no one will buy your shares, simply put. 

Firstly, people buying IPO shares aren't schmucks - mostly institutional investors who do extensive diligence. Someone who's recently taken the SIE can correct me, but believe the public can only buy a limited percent of IPO shares, like 10% or something, and even then the Fidelity and Ameritades of the world limit "public" to people with like 500k+ in their investmnt account. So either way, it's not some random loser buying your shares, it's someone experienced who knows how to diligence. Many, many IPOs that fall apart are because these investors find holes in the company and won't give it the valuation they want.

Second, an IPO that drops upon listing is a colossal fail for the underwriter. SmileDirectClub, which made it public but then got clobbered, was an embarrassment. WeWork didn't make it to an IPO (although snuck in via SPAC) because of the above investor valuation issue, and its underwriters got dragged through the mud. No one will agree to underwrite something that is wildly inflated because it's a bad mark on them and they have to answer to investors.

 

you fucker stop putting holes in my idea,

1 - theyll underwrite because im giving them 9 figures in fees

2 - institutions will buy so they can lend at absolutely unheard of rates to short sellers (who are the real retards who pay the institutions, who in turn pay me)

3 - its not a real company, im paying myself and letting it tank, doesnt matter how embarassing it is

4 - ill ipo at a normal valuation (say 100k) then artificially reduce the float to zero, then make another offering at a 15 bil which would force buyers to buy it since the float is nonexistent

 
bottombuckethardo

you fucker stop putting holes in my idea,

1 - theyll underwrite because im giving them 9 figures in fees

2 - institutions will buy so they can lend at absolutely unheard of rates to short sellers (who are the real retards who pay the institutions, who in turn pay me)

3 - its not a real company, im paying myself and letting it tank, doesnt matter how embarassing it is

4 - ill ipo at a normal valuation (say 100k) then artificially reduce the float to zero, then make another offering at a 15 bil which would force buyers to buy it since the float is nonexistent

You give a real 2.5 GPA vibe - I bet you’re great in interviews.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

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"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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