38 Comments
 
DBCooper

Get long the Daddy Issue Index.

I've been rolling with the DXX for like...28 years

 
peinvestor2012

Similar to an insurance policy on her life? I think that is the way to go.

WSO celebrity death pool?

I'll toss in 5 bananas.

"Mr. Perkins poses an extreme risk to the market when drunk."
 

Long: bleach, coke, pregnancy tests, morning-after pills, American Society of Plastic Surgeons, whichever brand condoms big black guys wea... wait

Short: society, hope, education, Disney, New York Jets

 

If the borrow on Miley is too high, you might still be able to short Amanda Bynes as a skank proxy and buy long dated way out of the money puts for an early bet on Selena Gomez as a levered bet on Disney kid stars turned coke whores.

 
Best Response
SirTradesaLot

If the borrow on Miley is too high, you might still be able to short Amanda Bynes as a skank proxy and buy long dated way out of the money puts for an early bet on Selena Gomez as a levered bet on Disney kid stars turned coke whores.

The Amanda Bynes trade is over. Her stock might still go to zero but there isn't enough market cap left to make it a worthwhile trade.

LEAP puts on Gomez though, that sounds promising.

There's also a possible long trade in the distressed assets of Britney Spears. It's still pretty early but there might be a turnaround in progress.

You could also play the dying industry liquidation play in shares of Teri Hatcher and Demi Moore. I'm not a big fan of the sunset trade, but to each their own.

 

Long: long hair

Short: short bleached hair

GET IT!!!

Seriously:

Short: DIS

"It's very easy to have too many goals and be overwhelmed by them... The trick is to find the one thing you can focus on that represents every other single thing you want in life." -- @"Edmundo Braverman"
 
Xepa

All the publicity 1 week before her new album drops?

Forget that, I'm going long! In more ways than one!

exactly
If the glove don't fit, you must acquit!
 
WalMartShopper Xepa:

All the publicity 1 week before her new album drops?

Forget that, I'm going long! In more ways than one!

exactly

bruh bruh All publicity is not good publicity. Miley does not do the bad girl thing well. It will be a net negative.

"Mr. Perkins poses an extreme risk to the market when drunk."
 
West Coast rainmaker

Cyrus / Rehab convergence trade.

Pre-rehab: Short DIS

Post-rehab: Long DIS

She will probably use some sort of "Mel Gibson Defense."

"It's very easy to have too many goals and be overwhelmed by them... The trick is to find the one thing you can focus on that represents every other single thing you want in life." -- @"Edmundo Braverman"
 

Enim dolores et libero magnam dolorem laboriosam accusantium. Ipsam explicabo omnis et ea rem pariatur laudantium. Esse sint dolorem unde.

Fugit et enim eveniet culpa. Adipisci fugit neque vel modi fuga et. Voluptas sunt aut impedit similique libero. Ut ut ut pariatur sit cupiditate.

Aliquam rerum odit porro neque molestiae beatae eligendi. Harum eum ut voluptas sint. Facilis aperiam incidunt et consequatur possimus. In non debitis quas nobis blanditiis vero et rerum.

Commercial Real Estate Developer

Career Advancement Opportunities

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.3%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.2%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Evercore No 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 01 98.3%
  • Banco Santander 02 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.2%

Professional Growth Opportunities

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 06 98.3%
  • Goldman Sachs 01 97.7%
  • JPMorgan 01 97.2%

Total Avg Compensation

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (16) $429
  • Associates (46) $258
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (14) $159
  • 1st Year Analyst (80) $150
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (73) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
3
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
4
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
5
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
6
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
7
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
10
numi's picture
numi
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”