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Yeah, it's a flaw of mine actually. I'm in college and I never ask professors for help. I buckle down and try to figure it out myself. I think I've become much more resilient and independent with this attitude, but on the flip side, my life would probably be a lot easier if I asked for help when I really needed it.
This is something that fits me as well. I refuse to ask for help until I am certain that asking for help is the only way forward. I often think of this in one of two ways:
1. I'm annoying someone who doesn't know how to help me
2. I'm annoying someone who might be able to help me, but probably doesn't want to
People can even be nice and act in a helpful manner, but a lot of the time, I still feel like I'm someone who gets upset or angry at myself when I have to bring someone else into the picture.
With college and work, I've gotten better a reaching out to people for assistance, especially when it's necessary. It's something that I still strive to improve on.
In general though, I think it's not worthwhile to struggle when asking can lead to a solution, and, better yet, the knowledge of how to do the thing that you struggled so much with before. This is really what makes me feel more comfortable with asking others for help. Overall, I think it makes sense as something we all should do.
I struggle with the other side of the coin. Sometimes I feel that people ask for help too much from me when I never ask for help from them.
This is not a flaw. This is the right way to live. People who disagree got too many hugs growing up and have a worldview incomprehensible to me.
It's not the right way to live at all. If you can't do something, and you can't find out how to do it online, then ask for help. Sounds like you're just insecure about looking dumb to others
I'm insecure about ever needing anyone for anything or depending on anyone for anything.
http://chrisdcoach.com/blog/2019/7/10/dont-have-assistants
I'm a bit of a hypocrite and don't follow this advice 100%, but the way I look at it is like this - my asst does their job, I do mine, I don't ask for help with what I do, but I do delegate if it's not my role.
I've noticed that when you're too dependent on others you can really get thrown for a loop when shit goes south. I've seen advisors go into a tailspin if their asst is out of the office for one day, heaven forbid maternity leave. so while I think delegation of duties is important, being autonomous is more important
When I was younger I dreaded asking others for favours or help. Then I realised that:
1. Fuck my big fat ego
2. If you make sure you make it clear that the other party can in turn ask back a favour you can build decent relationships that way, esp in a business context
3. Humans are supposed to cooperate. Why would I want to do everything myself at 80% efficacy when there's someone who can do it for 95% in less time?
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