Messing With Coworkers By Using Vocabulary of Napoleonic General
So we all know the classic corporate jargon like "let's touch base", "ping me", "taking this offline", "try not to boil the ocean", "bandwidth".
In the past couple of week I've been using words that makes me sound like a military general from the Napoleonic Era, by using slangs like these.
"We haven't crossed the Rubicon on this file yet" in reference to not yet sending an LOI
"Let's put some boots on the ground" in a conversation the day before on-site DD
"We'll get this deal done but it'll be a Pyrrhic victory" when talking about a potential shitco yet has a decent multiple
"Let's call in the cavalry" to an analyst to tell him to bring in a VP
"Let's go into this meeting shock-and-awe style" when talking about an initial with targetco's management team.
"Let's discuss this in the war room" referring to the coffee place downstairs during a Teams meeting.
"Let's not throw the analyst into the lion's den" when being told to assign him tough tasks
"Let's blitzkrieg this deal over the next week or it'll be our Waterloo", self explanatory
So far I've gotten some puzzled looks and polite smiles but nobody seems to grasp what I'm up to yet.
Based on the most entertaining WSO threads, your approach to spicing up corporate jargon with Napoleonic-era military references is both hilarious and bold. It’s a creative way to break the monotony of typical office lingo, but it seems like your coworkers might not fully appreciate the historical flair just yet. Here are a few tips to refine your strategy:
Know Your Audience: Not everyone is a history buff or will immediately catch the references. Gauge your coworkers' reactions and adjust accordingly. If they seem confused, you might want to tone it down or explain the context subtly.
Balance is Key: While it’s fun to inject personality into workplace conversations, overdoing it might come off as eccentric or distracting. Use these phrases sparingly and in situations where they truly fit.
Educate Through Humor: If someone asks about your phrasing, use it as an opportunity to share a quick, lighthearted explanation. For example, “Oh, ‘crossing the Rubicon’ is just a fancy way of saying we’re making a decisive move—Julius Caesar vibes!”
Test the Waters: Try these phrases in smaller, informal settings before using them in high-stakes meetings. This way, you can gauge how well they land without risking any awkwardness in front of senior leadership.
Keep It Relevant: Some phrases, like “boots on the ground” or “war room,” might already have a place in corporate lingo. Others, like “Pyrrhic victory” or “Waterloo,” might need a bit more context to resonate.
Your creativity is commendable, and with a bit of fine-tuning, you might just become the office legend who made Napoleonic jargon cool. Just don’t let it become your own Waterloo!
This is really funny and I quite like this type of harmless trolling. It may make you look like an autist to some though if you say this with a serious expression on your face but I think you should roll with it regardless.
From Zero to One (Thiel):
Oh, they grasp what you're doing...
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