Incoming FT analyst, moving to NYC soon--
I really want to delete social media (Instagram/Snapchat) since it's helped alot with my mental health in the past. I'm able to better focus on my goals, be happier, waste less time, and I have better self-esteem.
However I'm also afraid of the FOMO, since I'll be meeting tons of new people in NYC. Definitely consider myself an extrovert. Love mixing with new social circles and keeping in touch with cool people. Given the energy and vibe of NYC, I'm afraid I might miss out in the social/networking/dating scene if I delete IG/Snap, even though it's best for my mental health.
Any advice for me? Has anyone been in similar shoes?
Edit: grammar
Maybe keep FB deactivated but keep messenger? Seems like a lot of people use that to communicate so at least you'll have that.
I've also considered deleting IG/Snapchat because I'm sick of coming across softporn which makes me incessantly horny (hint: it's just a platform for girls to show off their bodies) throughout the work day
Agreed.
Snapchat has the most degenerate recommendations and I would highly recommend never swiping right when you open the app
Wow yes. And I thought my feed was the only prelude to a Brazzers vid
Did you really just create a new account on WSO to post a comment on my comment?
"However, I'm also afraid that I'll be meeting tons of people in NYC." - what?
What's the correlation of deleting social media and meeting people/networking? Anyone who stipulates a relationship/connection (in any context) to be contingent on social media isn't worth the air they breath in the first place.
Good on you though, in terms of intention, if I understand correctly.
Phrasing, my bad.
What I meant to say: Since I'll be meeting lots of people in NYC, I'm afraid I won't be able to keep in touch- especially since people nowadays exchange Instagrams/etc.
Keep the social active to connect with people you meet as well as showcase your life; just use it sparingly or use a time setting on it if it's that bad for you.
Totally agree. Post a little bit, set a 30 minute timer on Insta or just don't let yourself scroll / mute everyone that's not a friend you truly want to keep in touch with. Girls will want to diligence a guy on insta before they go out with you.
Snap is missable, fine to delete
Snap is soft-core porn at this point
Recently went through and cleaned out my contacts, IG, and Snap to just my closest friends and family. I also delete/lock all my social media apps until Friday night til Sunday afternoon. Limiting it and just seeing who you’re closest with works for me. I don’t think I’d fully deactivate or delete my accounts, I’m a bit far from home and don’t catch up often so it’s nice in that regard.
Put off the vibe that you’re looking for in like-minded people, meaning that if you eradicate social media from your life, you’ll likely attract people who have done the same.
anecdotal experience - halfway through college I deleted FB, insta, Snapchat - my life has never been better and fuck FOMO. I’ve never wavered in my decision.
Same here, have significantly cut down the use of IG - maybe check once every month and have a much better mental health / do not worry about what others are thinking.
Same here, social media is just a time suck. Unless you're an influencer and use it specifically for commercial purposes it's nothing but a way for these companies to collect more of your data IMO
+1, just wanted to comment that I did the same and am very glad I did. Allowed me to focus on myself and the people I really cared with more, instead of comparing myself to people who started in different places and had different skill sets that I lacked (very dumb, but I was super guilty of this).
I’m often guilty of this, too. Very challenging.
Same here. Deleted all that shit first semester of college and never looked back. Your free time and the quality of the people you are around increase dramatically. Went from reading 2-5 books a year to upwards of 30-40 all because I just had so much god damn free time and figured I should make use of it
The nerds here are about to get mad and throw MS but social media validation and pre-selection is such a massive boost to the dating game. If you do well in that department, then more power to you and maybe you don’t need it
You don’t even need to be super active. The main criteria is that it shows you’re not a fucking weirdo, you get girls, you have money, and you have fun
Fair point. I've also heard of it working the opposite way, too: Not having social media adds this sense of "mystery" and no one can IG stalk you. Builds up some excitement/wonder. Tons of my friends got more dates when they were offline, citing this same thing. Myself included. But I've also heard the "pre-selection" side of the argument too, hence the confusion.
Also there's this and this.
Nerds? You're literally a typical soyboy jerkoff
" The main criteria is that it shows you're not a fucking weirdo, you get girls, you have money, and you have fun"
I would bet my net worth, w/ 10x leverage, you date the dumbest sluts in Manhattan
You’d be a dumbfuck broke boi, because I don’t live in Manhattan
If a girl is dating and judging you because of your IG profile and pictures, good luck with that.
IG is stupidly fake. We all know that everyone crafts their profile to get the “right image”. Any girl using that as sole guidance has no IQ at all.
Social media was great until it was abused for monetary purposes. Now it might as well cause lesions in your brain. If you need motivation, take 90 minutes and watch The Social Dilemma on Netflix.
I deleted all of my social media years ago, and have never made a better decision for my mental health. I felt the effect immediately. Then I felt remorse, but after a month I could tell I was much happier, and was less burdened by depression and anxiety. I know some people who do not feel affected at all from social media, but they are also never on it. It does not sound like you are that person.
Delete the profile(s), not just the app. Holding onto the profiles is like keeping a cigarette in the back of the spice rack for "just in case". You either quit or you don't
Edit: Spelling
Was in the lower east side and heard this Instagram lady say, “he only has 13k followers I’m not going to respond to his dm”
I think it matters for dating tbh - you need to show you have clout and a social group
for what it’s worth I agree it’s dumb and shouldn’t be used to assess someone’s value. But you have to play the game and modify your strategy. Think of it as an out of the money call option that’s free.
Sounds like a great person to go on a date with!
But would you ever want to be with this kind of girl? Myself, I would only want a good nut with her potentially, but nothing beyond that (marriage, long-term relationship, etc.)
She sounds horrible dude, why would you ever want to be in a LT relationship with a girl like that?
Yeah it’s superficial
Don't delete instagram, especially if you want to bang with efficiency. Have some good photos and by good i mean fucking EXCELLENT photos. You don't need a lot but aim for minimum like 12 or smth so that your feed is scrollable. Don't put up "highlights". Don't post dumb shit on stories (like look at my coffee i made this morning or a picture of your watch after you went for a run and DEFINITELY not about food, cringest shit ever like i don't give a fuck if you just went eating at some Italian place or got sushi). And you better be sure you are not following more than you are being followed. Trivial shit i know but nowadays all (hot) chicks are on instagram. How is she gonna show/brag about you to her friends if you are not on instagram? You say that you don't want to date someone who is superficial like that. But let me tell your something from experience, chicks that are not on instagram are generally too weird / too fat / too ugly / too poor or a combination of everything I mentioned. This doesn't mean she has to glue her face to her phone 24/7 to be on instagram, it means that if she doesn't have profile or pics, she probably is not someone you want to date. Sure you will occasionally meet someone who is perfect and not on socials, but why limit yourself? Don't listen to the broke nerd talk on here, unless you are one yourself and have nothing to show.
One last tip: if you flex (as you should) do it subtly. Don't post a pick of yourself leaning on your fucking bmw, or an obvious watch flex. Make it subtle, make it about yourself first. But show enough that chicks will zoom in (in the case of a watch) and see nothing because instagram pictures are compressed garbage. But then she will wonder: woah is that watch a rolex or an omega? He must be successful r whatever what do i know I'm not a achick but that's how i imagine their brains to work. Point being, don't look like you are trying to flex. Because you are not flexing, you are just being successful and looking good like you always do
lol
Don't delete them, turn off ALL their notifications. No red bubbles that indicate somebody snapped you, because that creates a sense of urgency. We don't want urgency. And put them all in separate folders so it's not easy to check them all at once. You'll quickly grow out of the habit of checking all your social medias at once, but on the off chance you have free time then you can spend that time to check it.
agreed, horselover
Have had FB account deleted for 6+ years, Snapchat and IG deleted off my phone for 3+ years. Haven't thought about any of them in many months before seeing this post, if that gives you any perspective.
the fact that the responses in this thread are so all over the place tells me it's possible to both get ass and strike out without socials, so do what makes YOU happy
insta allows you to freeze the profile so you don't appear anywhere, but if you want to ever go back, just log back in
I’ve permanently deleted my various profiles (except LinkedIn) for a few months now and it has 100% contributed to my growth as a person and a man.
Some things of noticed during this period:
I’m not going to tell you how to live your life, these are just my observations from my experience. Aside from all that, my personal opinion on experiencing NYC is best more in tune with the people and various cultures of the area. It’s a beautiful and fun experience when you’re clear in the spirit.
Have fun, good luck -
Maybe keep facebook as others have said. Barely anyone I graduated college still uses snapchat anymore
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