On Ambition, Cigars, and Women: The Finer Things in Life. A Conversation with a Refined Asian Gentleman (Target Schools only)

Dear Gentlewomen and Gentlemen of Elite Target Institutions:

I am writing to let you know that I have determined the finest things in life to be (in no particular order):

  • beautiful and smart white women with big round eyes and porcelain skin
  • cuban cigars
  • summer vacations “out east” in the hamptons and martha’s vineyard
  • Chteau Margaux fine wine
  • a fine, liberal arts education
  • engineering competence (for well rounded-ism)
  • white women
  • academic prestige and excellency (e.g., columbia, princeton, yale)
  • Polo (not the clothing)
  • yacht racing
  • sustained financial success in your proven field (banking, law, medicine, academia, research, etc…)
  • white women
  • an appreciation for classical music
  • an appreciation for other forms of cultural and artistic expression (raps about social issues, rock music with political fervor, etc…)

It is my sincere wish that my fellow Ivy League gunners and social entrepreneurs strive for the above-stated goals of excellency, ambition, and self-advancement.

Let us all become better, harder-working, and more refined gentlewomen and gentlemen of this fine institution and nation.

Sincerely, Refined Asian Guy Class of 2012

19 Comments
 

I've never wanted to hit someone I haven't met more than I do right now.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford
 
Best Response
Refined Asian GuyDear Gentlewomen and Gentlemen of Elite Target Institutions:

I am writing to let you know that I have determined the finest things in life to be (in no particular order):

  • beautiful and smart white women with big round eyes and porcelain skin
  • cuban cigars
  • summer vacations “out east” in the hamptons and martha’s vineyard
  • Chteau Margaux fine wine
  • a fine, liberal arts education
  • engineering competence (for well rounded-ism)
  • white women
  • academic prestige and excellency (e.g., columbia, princeton, yale)
  • Polo (not the clothing)
  • yacht racing
  • sustained financial success in your proven field (banking, law, medicine, academia, research, etc…)
  • white women
  • an appreciation for classical music
  • an appreciation for other forms of cultural and artistic expression (raps about social issues, rock music with political fervor, etc…)

It is my sincere wish that my fellow Ivy League gunners and social entrepreneurs strive for the above-stated goals of excellency, ambition, and self-advancement.

Let us all become better, harder-working, and more refined gentlewomen and gentlemen of this fine institution and nation.

Sincerely, Refined Asian Guy Class of 2012

Cool story bro. How's Ithaca this time of year?

"For I am a sinner in the hands of an angry God. Bloody Mary full of vodka, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now and at the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen."
 

This post is so packed with disdainful social stereotypes and self-serving arrogance that when coupled with a sarcastic handle, it creates a paradox that is borderline amusing and acceptable. It's almost as if he came across an old paragraph written as an introduction for a public speaking class, contemplated submitting it to WSO, and concluded "Certainty of death, small chance of success... What are we waiting for?" Methink this is a decent troll. Bravo.

I haven't had a carb since 2004.
 

Sequi est eius culpa. Et omnis sit enim voluptas dolore. Repudiandae maiores quisquam itaque quasi.

Voluptatem vel aliquid temporibus vel perferendis animi pariatur. Reprehenderit laudantium accusamus et perspiciatis consectetur. Dolor ipsum minima nesciunt sit ipsam debitis.

Ipsam aut numquam tempore tempora iusto illo maxime. Quas fugit nesciunt dolorum illo quisquam totam. Est sunt nihil accusantium id.

Eveniet in ut quia eligendi doloremque repudiandae et. At et molestiae beatae voluptate amet earum. Et veritatis quo et tempora. Quas nisi nobis reprehenderit sit minima eligendi.

Career Advancement Opportunities

November 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.5%
  • Moelis & Company 01 99.0%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.4%
  • Guggenheim Partners 02 97.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 06 97.4%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

November 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.5%
  • Morgan Stanley 02 99.0%
  • Evercore 01 98.4%
  • Banco Santander 02 97.9%
  • BMO Capital Markets 13 97.4%

Professional Growth Opportunities

November 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.5%
  • Moelis & Company 01 99.0%
  • Morgan Stanley 05 98.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 01 97.9%
  • JPMorgan No 97.4%

Total Avg Compensation

November 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (16) $429
  • Associates (57) $264
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (28) $184
  • Intern/Summer Associate (16) $161
  • 1st Year Analyst (84) $151
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (76) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
3
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
4
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
5
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
6
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
7
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
10
Mimbs's picture
Mimbs
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”