Overthinking

Thinking too much about your future, trying to give the most specific path possible in your life, do you see this as an advantage or a disadvantage?
I recently spoke with a family member about this, on his advice I should manage the present more, but what I believe is that to get to certain positions you have to know what you're into to have a certain competitive advantage, what is right?
How did you find it and at what moment in your life did you understand what you wanted to do? Did you give more importance to your innate skills or those that you could potentially learn to pursue your passion?
Thanks for reading

 

Everything must be in moderation, even thinking about the future. This is both right and wrong at the same time, because sometimes you need to plan several steps ahead.

 

Depends - you have to think about it from the perspective of the bell curve. For the group between -2 +2 standard deviations, it makes sense to have this structure and path. But if you are above that +2 standard deviations, having too much of rigidity and no room for flexibility will decrease your potential expected value. 

 

If you are the next elon musk, it makes sense to drop out of college and focus on creating the next big startup. If you are decently smart, hard working and ambitious, it makes sense to go down the 2+2 route. You have to assess your own capabilities in determining how much risk is too much.  

 

Write down your goals and under each one write how you plan to get there. Every day you should be doing something to get closer to your goals. For lofty goals or dream goals, make a second or third option so you are always prepared.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 
Most Helpful

In full disclosure, my natural bias is to overthink everything as well. Thinking too much about your future is paralyzing for the majority of people, and I'd argue most anyone who focuses on it too much will be quickly overwhelmed. I recommend setting up a vision and goals for yourself, knowing that they will change over time. Within that you can then build out a framework on what you need to accomplish day to day to reach those, and flex those as you see fit. 

Being present generally is one of the biggest superpowers that exists nowadays. Everyone is on their phone, looking to the next meeting, or busy worrying about their next 'thing' rather than completing, focusing, executing, or simply experiencing what is in front of them. It's not mutually exclusive to thinking ahead and planning for your future. 

As far as getting to a certain position you want - it's identifying what it is, and the skills necessary to get there. I'd recommend avoiding thinking about the 'right path' or the 'right career option' - they largely don't exist, unless you are a neurosurgeon or a similar more linear type path. 

On the skills side - I tend to err on the side of pressing your strengths and managing your weaknesses so they don't undermine you. You can take an assessment or simply figure out yourself what you are and aren't good at. You'll need a mix of innate and learned skills - again - it's going to vary widely depending on your interests. What I'd recommend you not doing is picking a career path that doesn't somewhat align with your strengths - this doesn't mean 'do what you love and you'll make money', that's bad advice IMO. I think, to me at least, it means finding the right balance of role that engages you, let's you lean into your strengths, expands your skillset, progresses you toward your goal, and provides your standard of living. I'd personally not hate what I do to make the most money possible - but to each their own. 

 

Thank you very much for the time that you put to write such a helpful advice, for curiosity you choose what you do now instantly out of college or after changes in your life? Thank you again for your time!

 
mbo

Thank you very much for the time that you put to write such a helpful advice, for curiosity you choose what you do now instantly out of college or after changes in your life? Thank you again for your time!

Absolutely - happy to share my thoughts on this, hopefully they prove helpful. 

Admittedly, I'm not sure I really chose what I do per se. I majored in finance and coming out of school imagined being an analyst or something - the idea of saying 'I work in finance' had a cachet to it (probably why I joined this forum in the first place - "prestige" and an interest in financial markets). I came in the back door, and really through the basement of the firm I work at today. In effect - I did not choose what I did now out of college, and never would have imagined doing what I am today. 

I hate to use the word luck in this context, but I have been very fortunate throughout my career. I've had multiple bosses/mentors who helped create opportunities for me, leveraged my skillsets, and put me in positions to succeed. I'm a hyper generalist that has a deep knowledge of our business, network across our firm, and the ability to jump into anything and everything that's needed. I don't have a vision board of what I want to be nor do I have a ton of conviction on the 'role' so to speak I want. I'm not even sure I could duplicate the path I took (something I've had to think more about through annual planning now that I'm not just an individual contributor). All that to say, the biggest choices I made were to stick with my current firm and trust that the opportunity set would keep growing for me to take advantage of - I didn't pick a position or a function really... I somewhat created my role as I went. 

Since this is now a 'what I wish I knew when I was starting out' type topic - I'll leave you with this advice. Don't overthink yourself out of opportunities and don't be afraid to reinvent yourself constantly. If you choose a corporate path - you'll need to reinvent yourself multiple times as you take on new roles that require different skillsets. Start by picking something, kill it, and if you find yourself wanting something else pivot to that. 

 

Specificity in the plan is something I get hung up on too, pretty much fall back on the acknowledgement that this sensation of white-knuckled scrutiny is a good problem to have 🤷‍♂️

 

The past has happened and unchangeable while the future is always uncertain and unpredictable, no matter how much you overthink about it.

I often overthink about my future too much, which only results in wasting of my time and energy.

Therefore, we should just be like a river and flow down the valley of life, living every moment to the fullest. In this way, you will eventually find the interest and what you are good at, but till then, let your life take its own course.

Trust the process, introspect yourself, but never be hasty in making such decisions. I have seen many people just hastily making certain decisions of their life and then regretting. So, give some time to yourself and everything will be just fine.

In conclusion, control the controllable, which is neither your past nor the future. It’s the present! 🎁

This is my opinion 😊

 

I think dwelling on your plans, hopes, aspirations (future) can undermine your connection to the present, just as dwelling on nostalgia and memories (past) also undermines your connection to the present. You need to have a balance, you need to understand where you come from and your forming experiences to better understand who you are in the present, and you also need an aspiration and goal to inspire your efforts in the present.

However being present and executing 110% with intention, purpose, clarity of mind, and honest emotions every day is far more important than being in the past and being in the future.

Therefore to your original post I feel you are both right - you need an aspiration, but you also can't let the future (or the past) undermine you absolutely crushing the competition in the present. My favourite practises for being present is working out without music or distractions, being present in my body and executing to failure. The other is playing music (not listening to music).

 

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