I'm at a small MM Bank right now. Rumor has it there might be a name change. We are a healthcare-focused bank deal size of $50M - $350M. It got me thinking. What would I name the bank if I had the choice? This is where I decided to take it to WSO.. Don't let me down here.
You are the CEO of a MM bank. You want to change your name. What would your firm's name be???
EDIT: Put the those Ms in so I stop getting so much hate.
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You do $50 dollar deals lol.
Ed, Edd n Eddy
Un ironically yes
tito ortiz and associates
THE Tito Ortiz? As in the fighter?
If so, I shall name my bank Sonnen and Company. The baddest bank run by the baddest man in West Linn, Oregon.
hahahaha tito can't tie his shoes
plot twist: the only beverage the employees are allowed to drink while working is Tito’s vodka
Pierce and Pierce, of course.
how do ppl still think these references are in the least bit funny or interesting
According to the Terms and Services of WSO, every thread has to reference American Psycho at least once. Ask Patrick I guess. Coincidence his name is Patrick? I think not.
Interestingly enough, I can't think of any bank that has its name as "PersonX & PersonY." Much more common in law I guess
Dewey, Cheatem & Howe
A man of culture
Howe Dewey Screwum
Prestige Worldwide and require all the analysts to wear black leather gloves throughout the day.
At the start of every pitch when walking in the room you have to say "We're here to fuck shit up"
Tobin & Co.
And have that crazy Karen who's connected to Jeffrey Epstein take you to court?
Haywood Jablome Financial Corp
The correct answer is Duke and Duke
Manhattan West Group, Inc.
Gramercy Partners
This sounds like an aggressively guido apartment brokerage
Westin Sykes & Co. (For EB)
Tyr Capital Management
Corona Partners
Dig Bick Capital Management
Big Dick Energy, LLC for short BDE
The Big Swinging Dicks
Come Honor Face Partners
Come OnHer Face
Goldman Sachs
Silverman Bags
The* Goldman Sachs
Nevercore
Black Ridge Partners
West, Ed, Earls & Dunn Partners. Small MM healthcare bank, that is focused and stoked on medicinal cannabis.
Strength Capital
BDSM Capital
whatever randolph and mortimer named their company in the film trading places. hire eddie murphy as your md
Stratton Oakmont
Broke
Stratton Oakmont
Bespoke
Douche & Touche Capital Partners
Bananastone
Old Yellen after my girl Janet
OK this one actually made me laugh
Reminds me of Old Yeller... really sad book.
Simps and Chimps
Yuge Capital
For a healthcare fund with long duration holds... Patient Capital
Black Pebble
Vitiate
Peirpoint Morgan
Oak Hedge Meadows
Chartered as First National United National First Bank; years later rebranded as FirstTrustFirst.
.
Banque De Salope Merde or BDSM for short. Everything sounds sexier in French
Oasis on Wall Street
Only hire from WSO forum members
Sike That's The Wrong Number LLC
So when my Analysts make mistakes in a model that result in a wrong valuation, at least the client will look at us and say "oh... that makes sense now".
Booze & Snooze Assoticets. BSA for short.
Always going to be either a founder name, some kind of natural formation like a rock or cliff preceded by some nondescript color, or something totally esoteric no one expected haha. Let us know what the name (or what arena it falls in) ends up being.
Brown Running Creek Capital
OnlyBanks
BTS
Like all MM banks, it should be named "Heaven"
True True
if you doing 50 to 350 dollar deals then uhhh you workin at a sperm bank.
I got "BrownView Advantage" with https://www.hedgefundnamegenerator.com/. Sounds about right.
Huh. I got "Hudson River Partners." Looks like it's real too lol http://hudrivcap.com/
Yo Mama Cap
Walpurgis and Co.
Chaddington, Chadwick, and Chadleton Partners (Nicknamed 3C)
Lehman Cousins
Sicilian Braille Capital Advisors (SBCA)
Is that bone?
FGT Partners
Foek Yue Advisory ... where you work? Foek Yue ... foek me? No, foek yue ...
[Last Name] & Co.
This is a relationship-, reputation-based industry, and putting your name on the firm's masthead shows you take that seriously.
Yasuo Capital
LMAO rubbing it in the faces of prospective clients that you´ll never perform for them but expect adorations without end for doing the bare minimum
Alphamonkey Capital Management
Blackboulder
Lizard
Pizz & Sex
Black Field Funds
Pussy Acquisitions
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