What's a Monkey's typical weekend plans?

How's it going you filthy Monkeys?

As we talk about our professional life and career aspirations on a daily basis, I became a little curious. What do you animals actually end up doing on the weekends?

Unfortunately I have to do the whole dinner and a movie routine with the old lady tonight, but Saturday is absolutely and 100% for the boys. Should make it out for a round of golf and then out to the city/bar for the night. Sunday will be exclusively for recovering from the prior night hangover, regathering my life, prepping a little bit for the Monday status update meeting at work, and various other administrative things I need to complete.

What are your guys' plans and best routines for the weekends? Hope everyone has a good time regardless!

 

This thread is everything I have been looking for. It's going to be legendary.

Too bad I don't really have fun weekends to speak of. I feel sorry for myself sometimes.

“I’m into, uh, well, murders and executions, mostly.”
 
Best Response

Friday night: drinks at a roof top bar. Usually $20-25 a drink, but thats what this industry is all about right, blowing excessive cash. Hit an upscale bar, then head to a club. Located in Chicago so usually am hitting Underground or Studio Paris. At which point ill grab the nearest scantily dressed bottle service girl and take her home. I know, I know, don't waste time on the sober girls just there to get you to spend more and get smashed, but I just implement my always be closing logic, and these bitches bite hard. Usually get back to my crib, top floor of a 40+ building overlooking the lake. Im too faded to pull, so I just throw 50s (usually have a couple between the couch cushions) her way and tell her to GTFO and figure it out. Hope to make it to my bed, but usually fall short and end up face down in my Kermanshah rug and pray I don't let my dinner come up and depreciate that fucker exponentially (happens twice a month, annual depreciation costs are high, or so my accountant tells me). Fuck, might even need to sell a Salvador Dali to cover that shit.

Saturday: nurse the hangover with plenty of kush and xans, hit up a brunch and get bottles for mimosas. Head into the office and dick around with all the interns, hide their backpacks (get a fucking briefcase already), delete key function in their models, and make sure my MD sees my face. Dude thinks Im in to grind, but I slip out the back after 20 minutes. Start to preagame for whatever show or concert im going to that night, slip on my Prada wingtips and hustle on over the the RS7. Pick up girls and homies, and we head to the show. Usually backstage/VIP is included, if not I chew the fuck out of whatever intern got the wrong package. If the performer is having an after party somewhere, ill go there, if not, ill just host. 5K square feet should be enough room for his loser groupies and his fat squad of honeys. Proceed to sneak up to the roof and huck full bottles of Dom at the plebeians walking around outside my building. Scoff and chuckle at the idea of walking anywhere, then head to the nearest strip club. After Im twelve drinks deep and start having epiphanies about blowing a months salary in a weekend, pop more xans and whip the RS7 at 110-120 down LSD (Lake shore drive for foreigners). Cops know me, so usually one pulls me over just to make sure I dont need to call my driver to make it home in one piece. Get back, blunts in the living room while sipping on black label. Lines of blow off the VALDE countertop desk I just got, cause it matches the white tiger skins in the living room.

Sunday: recover

Suddenly wake up from my dream, remember it is Saturday morning and I am late for my second job at a boutique M&A firm (work 7 days a week), and hop on public transportation while contemplating ending it all. So yeah, in all honesty, my Saturday's are the same as my Monday's, but I usually find my dreams get more ambitious on the weekends. So I've got that going for me, which is nice.

 

Kudos, this was one of the most entertaining posts I've read in a while.

I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing. See my Blog & AMA
 

I've started to fall into a routine:

Friday Night: Go to 1-3 bars I've found where bands always play Saturday Morning: Do errands -- laundry, drafting networking emails, groceries. Work out Saturday Evening: Explore the surrounding area -- I guess one nice thing about not being in NY is having a car Sunday Morning: Sleep in, but I usually go to the office for a few hours Sunday Evening: Try out a new restaurant and get drinks with whatever Tinder date I set up earlier in the week

 

Friday: Get home ~6-7PM, work out, maybe take an epsom salt bath, do any real estate/online business work that needs to be done, make dinner if the wife hasn't yet, eat dinner with wife while watching a new Bourdain or Shark Tank or something, drink some tea, bang, go to bed ~10PM

Saturday: Wake up ~6AM, drink water, stretch/foam roll, maybe clean a bit, do any quick business work that needs doing, make coffee/tea, finish a french press while doing some work, reading articles, or maybe play Xbox for an an hour or two; when adequately caffeinated, walk to the park and do my weekly sprint workout, come home, make one of my signature superfood shakes and a post-sauna drink, drive to the gym, sit in the sauna while reading for 40-60 minutes, come home, stop at any errand places on the way (post office, home depot, costco, target), stop at a property if I need to, all the while sipping on my shake and post-sauna beverage and listening to podcasts, come home, bi-monthly shave, cold shower... it's now usually ~2-3PM by now and it's time for leisure at this point unless I've got unusually high real estate work volume or something else going on... Go out with the wife or just chill at home. Maybe pick up some steak and salmon and veggies and grill a bit, watch a movie, bang/chill/whatever, usually in bed by 10PM

Sunday is pretty much the same shit, except no sprints. Try to take my daily 1hr walk but it's mostly an off day.

That's just the template. In the coming weekends, we have a Warrior Dash on one weekend, Questival another, a couple birthdays, probably going to visit my mom in the burbs in a couple weeks. This particular Saturday, we've got a double date with one of my wife's teacher friends and her boyfriend who I've barely met. We'll see how that goes. Going to a comedy show and then this place: https://www.yelp.com/biz/chicago-pizza-and-oven-grinder-company-chicago If we can get in... they don't do reservations. Then wife's going to Madison all of Sunday and I've got maybe 4 hours of work to do and then will probably read for a couple hours then watch a movie or something.

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

I remember life before kids. I was less health conscious then, but similar schedule/priorities.

Out of curiosity did your wife go to Madison for the crossfit games? If not, she might've been in for a rude surprise when the town was run over.

twitter: @CorpFin_Guy
 

No actually she said it was pretty dead. There was apparently a state fair they didn't know about.

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

oh this shit is old news. no longer accurate. take back your bananas

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

As an intern (Consulting) in Chicago my weekends have all been the exact same.

Friday: home about 6, lift, dinner, pregame, bars until about 2, drunk pizza (slices only, deep dish is trash) home and asleep by 3 usually.

Saturday: up at 8 because sleeping in just doesn't happen. Regret all decisions I have ever made in my life as my head feels like I took a punch from Ali. Get a run in, one nice thing about Chicago is it's a fantastic running town. Dunkin iced coffee is $1.10 after 2 so me and a friend go every Sat and Sun. Best example of a fair exchange for goods and services I have ever experienced. Go out more low key (brewery, pub, etc.) and have a few beers with friends. Try and be home by 1.

Sunday: Lay in bed. Do some work, send some emails, etc. and then hot tub, sleeping pills at about 8 pm and I am out like a light by 9:30.

The hangovers getting worse as your grow older... by far the worst part of aging. Its 2017, why in gods name have we not figured out how to cure hangovers in a pill form by now.

 

Are you actually taking sleeping pills or referring to melatonin?

I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing. See my Blog & AMA
 

Friday: A beer or two, or three at home. Either doing some research or playing Dota2 during the aforementioned. I would occasionally write an article at website X.

Saturday: Wake up whenever. Light workout. Cheating day in terms of food. Cover different sectors of the market. Beers. I watch some old movie if I feel like I need a break.

Sunday: Similar to Saturday, the slight difference being that I actually try to wake up earlier and ignore the markets in order to have a real 'day off.'

Edit: I suppose that it sounds boring, but at a young age I reached the point where I rather chill at home with a beer than go out, get drunk (with various stimulants), and try to pounce on some skank at a club/bar.

 

Friday: usually get home from work around 8-10pm. Usually go to bed from a brutal week and very little sleep or go try to bang a chick I've been seeing (usually opt for bed).

Saturday: Wake up 9-10ish, then go to the office to process bullshit changes to CIMs that "need to be done asap so we can review as group Monday AM. thx" or updating some other document / model that could wait until Monday. Usually come home around 5pm and start figuring out what the night entails. Go pregame and go out to a mediocre bar. Usually end up near-blackout and making out with a solid 5.

Sunday: Wake up relatively hungover. Hangout on couch catching up with roommates and what not. Try to catch up on shows (currently on Shameless) and do errands (rarely groceries but mostly laundry). Get excited for game of thrones at 9pm but without fail my VP emails me to do some other ridiculous task that needs to be done tonight. Usually ruins my thrones experience. Go to bed and debate whether I should throw my VP through a wall tomorrow.

Monday: don't throw VP through wall but try to think of ways to fuck him in the annual review (spoiler alert: probably won't say half of what I want to).

 

Shameless is dope AF and don't let anyone give you shit for watching a chick show

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

Friday: Get out of work a little earlier (8ish) unless a big deal (in which case my entire weekend is in the office FML), make sure to lift after work and start hitting people up to find the scene/plan the night. Go to some shitty pregame, some shitty club. Try to find some relatively unattractive girl who thinks my business cards are cool.

Saturday: Wake up and regret my life decisions. Call brunch delivery, fuck around the apartment. Go lift at some point, maybe do some random things or screw around for a while. Have a standing dinner with the boys on Saturday nights, try to see what the scene is and repeat Friday night (except less drunkenly since I know I will have to work on Sunday).

Sunday: Wake up a little more alive, eat breakfast, go play squash, pick up my dry cleaning, go to the office from like 12-6, get dinner with someone (honestly try to schedule any dates I get for Sunday night). Go to bed and pray to make it through the next week.

 

Friday: spearfishing till sunset, bang the girl, have friends over for dinner, pregaming. hit the bars/clubs till 2ish

Saturday: either wake up early for more spearfishing or surfing, or sleep the fuck in. bang. Beach if it's nice or errands. Typically a few day beers. There's always something going down on saturday nights- go to whatever's going on.

Sunday: Sleep the fuck in. Clean the apt, try to do the shit I said I'd do saturday. usually bang 2-3x, the girl gets horny on sundays for some reason. Make some sangria and watch GoT with the homies. Bed by 9pm.

 

My life is far less exciting than some of yours.

A typical weekend:

Friday Night:

Either happy hour and dinner out with the live-in girlfriend or grab two bottles of wine and make some homemade pizza. Most Friday nights I'm absolutely exhausted and fall into a food coma with half a glass of cab on my nightstand.

Saturday:

Wake up, hit the gym, and go hit the links with a buddy of mine. Come home and do weekend things - either laze in front of the TV, go see a movie, do some activity in the city, etc. Usually make a big dinner with the lady.

Sunday

Gym, make a big breakfast, and do chores. Cook some meals, do laundry, clean, and do whatever needs to be done around the apartment. Do more weekend activities - tv, movie, read, video games, etc. and then wait for Game of Thrones.

Commercial Real Estate Developer
 

I wish I could add some good value to this thread. 9 month old baby. No life. Maybe next year? Is there hope for me yet?

"What's that dear?.. yes dear. Shutting laptop down now."

Working hard? Hardly working. Just kidding.. I'm smashing it! PREP QUESTIONS -FIND THEM HERE
 

I agree. Also, people act like kids are a death sentence. Maybe if you're a no-energy-having, unhealthy, unmotivated fuck. I have friends with kids. It's a big responsibility, but between two functional adults, it shouldn't be that big a fucking burden. Most people just shouldn't have kids.

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

Friday: Get home and go lift with my roommate. Pregame at our pad. Hit the bars within walking distance. Usually end up with a solid level of inebriation and female attention. Decent rate of closing.

Saturday: Wake up usually earlier than I should. Eat. Lift. Nap (sometimes). Go to the beach or a brewery or something and start drinking again. Go to bars again. Repeat Friday night shenanigans.

Sunday: Wake up slightly later than I did on Saturday. Eat. Lift. Nap (sometimes). Do productive things. Don't drink today (usually). GAME OF FUCKIN THRONES BABY. Sleep.

 

If I read your post correctly, the thing you look most forward to is Game of Thrones?

I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing. See my Blog & AMA
 

How do you have the mental capacity to keep up with an entire fictional political hierarchy? Watching that show seems exhausting.

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

Generally have two weekends, dictated by Saturday plans:

1) The active weekend: Get up early on Saturday, go for a motorcycle ride (anywhere from 2-8 hours round trip). Stop for coffee on the way, eat lunch. After getting home, it's usually just reading or watching movies/tv until sleep time.

2) The chill weekend: Sleep in, make/grab coffee. Watch Formula 1 qualifying, then read/fart around on the internet. Hit the gym, eat lunch, and then any combination of running errands, hanging with friends, going out for a movie/dinner/drinks, etc.

Always at church on Sunday morning, usually followed by brunch/lunch with friends.

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw
 
LeveragedTiger:
Generally have two weekends, dictated by Saturday plans:

1) The active weekend: Get up early on Saturday, go for a motorcycle ride (anywhere from 2-8 hours round trip). Stop for coffee on the way, eat lunch. After getting home, it's usually just reading or watching movies/tv until sleep time.

2) The chill weekend: Sleep in, make/grab coffee. Watch Formula 1 qualifying, then read/fart around on the internet. Hit the gym, eat lunch, and then any combination of running errands, hanging with friends, going out for a movie/dinner/drinks, etc.

Always at church on Sunday morning, usually followed by brunch/lunch with friends.

You watch quali but not the race?

 

I always watch the race: either before or after church. Didn't feel the need to specify it was something I did on Sundays, however.

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw
 

As a broke as fuck summer analyst this is what mine usually entails.

Friday: Usually leave the office with the boys around 6:00 pm. Shout out to my VP for being the man and letting us get out early. Go to a random dive bar around the office for a few rounds of drinks. Good to build solid relationships with the other summer analysts and full time analysts. All go out separate ways around 7:30 pm. 7:45 pm I get home and eat dinner with the girlfriend who now lives with me so we can save money. 8:00 pm my buddies start texting me to go out to some bar, tell them I can't because I'm broke. Watch a few movies with girlfriend and bed by midnight.

Satuday:

Get out of bed around 9:00. Have a few eggs, and then go to play tennis at one of the many public courts around my city. 1:00 pm go grocery shopping for our dinner. Usually something somewhat intricate. Cooking is a good hobby and a nice way to treat yourself. 6:30 pm we eat an early dinner then Netflix and bed by midnight.

Sunday: Rinse and repeat