Please review: MS Engineering student wants to break into IB

I graduated in May with my BA in mechanical. I developed a curiosity for the finance/consulting world in January after taking an interesting finance course in my last semester at school -- prior to that I've only taken intro economics. I luckily have an internship this summer at a hedge fund doing credit analysis for the fund's structured products.

I'll graduate in Dec. with my MS and am hoping I can secure an analyst position at a BB or a research position at a hedge fund.

Critique much appreciated.

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