am I completely lost and screwed? - suck at BB grad job in Trading

Graduated just under a year ago, and ended up working in S&T at top BB, in non-risk taking desk (will keep in brief for anonymity, but no risk/book, barely any market visibility due to nature of product). My learning has already plateaued (and any learning thus far has been about execution systems and less and less about the market). My performance has been less than spectacular - I am not stupid but very driven by interest - and exit ops too.

I do enjoy the markets and would like to try out taking views, or at least analysing something. I have tried to apply to other jobs and move internally but 1) wonder trading is for me (tried to learn coding but has been painstakingly slow and not my natural strength), 2) I've found AM/ER roles to be very competative and sparse, my corp fin/sector knowledge from my own reading is not really enough as no work experience in these areas at all 3) barely eligible for new grad roles, already missed deadlines for 2025 masters

My ulimate goal is to do a job for a few years in finance that pays decenlty, doesn't kill me, can teach me about investing, has some solid exits. ER seems pretty good for this. But given the above factors I feel like I am completely stuck in this job that is pretty long hours (12 on most days) that I do not enjoy, and am terrible at.