Lost SA

Just finished up my sophomore SA experience and got an offer to come back. Especially given the current environment, I'm really grateful that I had the opportunity to do the internship and get an offer. My problem is, I'm not sure if I want to go back next summer. I really liked my desk and the people I worked with, as well as the firm overall, but I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. My main issue was that I found myself feeling a little bored and I struggled to picture what my full-time life would be like, as well as picturing how I could grow within the company. There were no identifiable issues, just an overall apathetic feeling towards the internship. I wasn't bored because I didn't have work. I was definitely very busy, consistently stressed, and pretty confused since I found the products I was working with hard to understand. The work I got was interesting and felt like it had value for the desk, but I also felt bored at the same time. There also just wasn't a spark for me with the markets. Now that I'm done with the internship, I get excited that I don't have to read the news every morning and know what's going on with the markets and have an opinion on it. I only interned for a few weeks, I feel like if I'm excited to not have to look at this, this industry probably isn't for me. But, everyone did an abbreviated virtual internship this summer. For a business like S&T, I'm not sure you can really make a decision about whether you like it or not if you're not there in person.

In terms of feedback I got from managers, it was really really good. They might've just been being nice since it was all virtual, but no one ever corrected me for anything and I had no points for improvement at my weekly manager check-ins or at my end of internship review. If people who have been doing this for years think I'm doing a good job and are excited that I'm on the desk virtually, shouldn't I take that as a sign that I could do well in the industry?

If I didn't take the return offer, I wouldn't recruit for something else within finance. I'd move to something completely different, probably tech or consulting. The issue is, recruiting for these other industries would happen after my offer expired, so I'd have to make a choice and potentially give up S&T. I also don't know if I could realistically get an internship outside of finance. In an ideal world, I'd be able to test out another industry, and then decide whether I want to go back to S&T full time. But, I know a million guys would kill for an S&T internship and take a full time offer, so no one would wait for me. I also know that given this environment, I should probably take the safe option and take my return.

Anyone here not take an S&T return who can explain why, what they did instead, and whether they regret not doing S&T?