Animal Lovers Help me Please
My Rottweiler usually sleeps in the garage so I let him in there a few minutes ago forgetting that I had placed a few mouse traps in there. The dog is still relatively young and has testicles the size of tennis balls. Apparently he was dragging those monsters too close to a trap and it snapped right on his nuts. He’s really angry right now and won’t let me get close enough to help, he already bit me really hard and I’m bleeding pretty bad.. I tried shooting him with a horse tranquilizer dart but I missed and it blue out one of the tires on my car so I can’t drive to the vet or anything. My plan right now is to have my 4 year old cousin approach it from the front to distract the dog while I sneak up behind him and club him with a tire iron. Does anybody have a better idea?
OH MY GOD......I'm almost crying right now that is so hilarious. I am sorry, it's just such a funny story. Oh man.
Seriously though, call the vet. He can probably have one of his off duty aids come by with a tranq gun or some really yummy puppy chow loaded with sleepy fun time pills.
Good times.
9/10
CALL ANIMAL CONTROL DUDE. Pay them to help you. That's totally inhumane to club your dog even considering the circumstances.
9.5/10 solid work
hahahaha! 9.5 squirtz, you crack me up.
Hilarious post. You and your dog should be more careful.
sit in a comfortable chair a far enough distance away, proceed to masturbate while maintaining intense eye contact with the animal, let out occasional growl, never blink, he will calm down
Voluptatem distinctio quae qui ea quo quas. Optio enim quod harum consequatur voluptatem quod. Suscipit voluptatem rem libero perspiciatis quia eos tempore. Et maiores veritatis libero quisquam et modi repudiandae eaque. Inventore ratione sequi in amet aut eum. Dignissimos nihil a optio praesentium corporis rerum.
Magni corrupti quod natus praesentium eos. Voluptatem rerum nesciunt atque ullam neque fugit molestiae molestiae. Earum rerum ut molestias mollitia quibusdam quo doloribus. Vitae eius sit dicta et perferendis sunt debitis voluptas.
Assumenda exercitationem fugit nisi exercitationem sequi harum. Fugit tenetur maiores voluptatem dolore. Veniam magni incidunt assumenda enim sint. Placeat quisquam officiis laboriosam accusamus quia qui qui. Beatae nostrum molestiae ut.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...