Bachelor Party in Detroit - AM I FU*&ED?

Monkeys, we seem to have a bit of a problem here.

Buddy of mine has just decided to have his bachelor party in Detroit (I know WTF right), but I am in need of some help once again. What the hell is there to do in this god forsaken city to make sure this place never forgets our presence?

No, I do not feel like going to jail, but lets hear what you one trick ponies can come up with.

Thx in advance!

Region: 
United States - Midwest

Comments (37)

Jul 25, 2017

Damn. That's a tough one. I'd try tweeting at Kid Rock and ICP for suggestions.

    • 3
Best Response
Jul 25, 2017

you should all get hammered and then sneak onto the Ford assembly line and build a car. Not like the quality will be any less than their current product.

    • 19
Jul 25, 2017

I was thinking bonging a beer on the pitching mound of Comerica Park, but I like this idea much better. Let's continue in this direction.

Jul 25, 2017

Straight out of the Johnny Cash song "One Piece at a Time"

Jul 25, 2017

Visit 8 mile

    • 3
Jul 25, 2017

8 mile is for the birds, nothing flashy or memorable about it from what I hear. Just a ton of med mary jane dispos and used car dealerships

Jul 25, 2017

Yeah, it's literally just a street, not much unlike any other major street in the midwest.

Jul 25, 2017

Don't forget to pack some of mom's spaghetti

    • 3
Jul 25, 2017

Reenact scenes from the new movie "Detroit" in their actual locations.

    • 1
Jul 25, 2017

hmmm.. this is a bit of a tough one although certainly doable. The city has cleaned up quite a bit over the past few years and there's been an influx of younger people with tech moving in a bit, etc. There are a number of good restaurants around and other than that it obviously has all of the major market sports and entertainment. Not really sure about the nightlife but you're not too far away from some big schools, depending on how old you are and if you guys want to do campus bars. I imagine there would have to be some decent car related stuff too (race track?) as the North American guys all have their test tracks around there and I think there is a NASCAR event at the Michigan speedway. NASCAR isn't really my thing but I've heard it's really just a shitshow so you don't have to watch much NASCAR anyway.

Out of curiosity, why did your buddy pick Detroit?

    • 2
Jul 26, 2017

Thanks for the help, my buddy decided to pick Detroit because he is originally from Michigan. We went to undergrad together out in the midwest.

Jul 25, 2017

Go to Windsor and gamble.

    • 5
    • 1
Jul 26, 2017

This is something I'll need to look into, who says we can't burn down two cities in one night!?

    • 1
Jul 26, 2017

That might make a lot of sense. Also, strip clubs in Windsor are A+. Good talent, full show and relatively reasonable prices compared to other bachelor party destinations.

Jul 25, 2017

Buy up a whole block and get some go carts.
Or just steal cars. You'll blend in better that way anyway.

heister:

Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad.

https://arthuxtable.com/

    • 1
Jul 26, 2017

A little grand theft auto in viva las Detroit? I like where your heads at with this one

Jul 25, 2017

My college roommates and I made a drunk decision to drive there from Philly on a Saturday night to catch a Birds game last year

We went to Coliseum. It's legit.

Jul 26, 2017

I think Bazookies is the one that some of my friends have been throwing around, but I'll keep my eyes open for that one. Thanks man!

Jul 25, 2017

This works under the assumption that any other city you have ever been to gives a fuck about your presence. Hint: it doesn't.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays

Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne

    • 1
Jul 26, 2017

When you bring an entire city to it's knees, begging for mercy at 7am, you think it forgets that night? I think not.

Aug 30, 2017

I haven't heard this story yet but I can already tell that's not what happened.

"When you stop striving for perfection, you might as well be dead."

Jul 26, 2017

down 8 beers and swim across the detroit river
http://windsorstar.com/news/local-news/drunk-man-a...

    • 1
Jul 26, 2017

I think its the undertow of the river (from being a shipping port) that will suck you under, probably not the direction I want to go in here, but I like the creativity!

Jul 26, 2017

I'm going to a wedding there in September. I'm thinking that makes me eligible for veteran benefits at some point.

    • 2
Jul 26, 2017

That's Chiraq you're thinking of.

Jul 26, 2017

Engage in several rap battles after underestimating your own rhyming abilities.

Jul 26, 2017

no idea if there are beaches like in chicago, but you could bring some beach games for partying during the day, maybe see some music at night. but I second the above: go into canada and gamble, maybe get a hooker.

    • 1
Jul 26, 2017

I believe they do have spots by the river that assimilate beaches so I like the idea! Other ideas are also right up my alley, so I'm looking into those

Jul 26, 2017

if not everyone's a golfer, this is a good move. bocce, cornhold, spikeball, or just getting smashed by a body of water is always a good choice.

Jul 26, 2017

Buy some sledgehammers, get blackout drunk, and go spread some urban renewal to any of the abandoned blocks.

Jul 26, 2017

Hahah this is perfect, I can really see this going over well as I'm pitching it to all the guys...."Guys. We each need....SLEDGEHAMMERS!"

Jul 26, 2017

All joking aside, stay in Greektown. Its right downtown with lots of bars and casinos. I felt pretty safe walking around when I was there last year.

Jul 26, 2017

Yup, I think we are staying close to Greektown, good call!

Jul 27, 2017

BUMP - Anyone else have some ideas!?

Aug 30, 2017
Comment
"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn