A few weeks ago I took about 30 CBD melatonin gummies because I had trouble sleeping. I got pretty gakked out and had some crazy vivid dreams about Wall Street. I was in the middle of a vast ocean, but it wasn't water. The currents and waves were all capital flows. Huge waves of equity, debt, converts. All of it. I saw giant whale-like creatures that I think were the bulge brackets - these massive titans swimming through the capital, devouring everything in their path. Jamie Dimon rode by on a dolphin (he was nude) and said "hey bro, how's it hanging". It was a life changing experience.
Last year I took a trip to Wall Street with my heterosexual traveling companion, Silas. I love traveling with him because I always feel safe. He's jacked - was a college wrestler. No robber would dare mess with us. Anyway, no gay stuff happened (we're both straight). And walking around Wall Street (and Midtown) was incredible. Truly amazing. I took pictures in front of every bank HQ and kept shouting "this is where stuff happens!" to those passing by.
Anyone else feel this way?
Comments (21)
Oy vey
What the fuck did I just read
Array
My exact thoughts...
That's enough internet for today
Quant (ˈkwänt) n: An expert, someone who knows more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing.
Is Jamie hung?? Asking for a (heterosexual) friend
Jamie Hung (Née Lao-Tzu Hung) is a quality analyst, love that guy
Great analyst & great guy, not very hung though
Should have added "no homo" just to be clear
"Anyway, four dollars a pound"
😂😂😂😂
nice post, it really pounded me in the ass. I want what you're on bby
You Gen Z fuckers are weird as hell
This is the answer when they ask "why finance?"
This is a new level of down bad
Not sure why, but this made me laugh. Am I ok guys?
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Thanks for the cover letter template. SBed.
sounds like your friend really capitalized on your market. wow
This is really the greatest, most creative thing ive seen on this website
path less traveled
Hahaha SB'd
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