Looked the Fool, Go ahead, Laugh

So I basically spend my whole day researching companies and pitch MDs into considering me as an analyst. I graduated from non-target, is in HK, bla bla bla won't bore you with details.

The firm I was looking at publishes an Asian Equity Markets (which mostly describes Hong Kong) newsletter on a weekly basis, but on their website they list their most recent newsletter as January 31st, 2011. So I thought to myself, BINGO, that's my point of entry. They must be SOOOOO busy that they're not updating the all-important ECM newsletter. Below is the e-mail I sent to the MD, Head of Asia ECM:

Subject: Help with Newsletter?

Dear md,

I am a tri-lingual graduate (English/Mandarin/Cantonese) from [non-target, US]

I am extremely curious about your career path as I glanced over your [his firm] and LinkedIn profiles. I'm working towards a career in ECN, because I think syndication is something that fits my skill set and it is what I enjoy doing.

It has come to my attention that the ECN newsletter posted on your site is over 2 months old. It just so happens I am in Hong Kong and am looking to start my career at a top ECN team. Is your team looking for any analysts? I am not a real-life Jack Bauer but I have some great experiences and international exposure @ University of Hong Kong and Fudan University in Shanghai. If nothing else, I can help with the newsletter.

Thank you for your time. Please accept my apology if you found this e-mail intrusive.

Sincerely,

[my name]

So, three things:

  1. I reviewed the e-mail multiple times but I cannot believe I typed ECN instead of ECM, and do it 3 times. What the f**k was I thinking???

  2. The WORST PART IS, I subscribed to their newsletter mailing list, and the very next day, I get the March 28th, 2011 Newsletter. Looks like their newsletter is up-to-date after all, just not posted on their main site. F**K.

  3. He hasn't responded yet, but I hope this isn't get forwarded RE:RE:RE:RE. A cute analyst at the firm in a different division knows me. F**K.The firm is very high on my list, a great MM U.S. firm with great HK dealflow. I had spent many days researching it, but it just blew up.

Hope all future monkeys can learn from my moronic actions.

8 Comments
 

I read the Jack Bauer line 5 times and still don't get it. Where you e-mailing the MD offering your services as analyst/ newsletter writer/ counter terrorist operative?

 

Sint est reprehenderit architecto molestiae. Quam repellat esse distinctio. Sed quidem asperiores expedita et. Amet dolores amet earum. Voluptate perferendis ullam rerum quae iste. Qui sed animi numquam et eaque occaecati voluptates. Quae animi ducimus mollitia.

Beatae blanditiis maxime non. Eaque laudantium quam deleniti aliquid magni nesciunt. At aut omnis sit modi debitis dolores. Ut consectetur sint quia iste dolor magnam neque. Laboriosam hic non odit doloribus ratione dolor.

Career Advancement Opportunities

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.3%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.2%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Evercore No 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 01 98.3%
  • Banco Santander 02 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.2%

Professional Growth Opportunities

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 06 98.3%
  • Goldman Sachs 01 97.7%
  • JPMorgan 01 97.2%

Total Avg Compensation

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (16) $429
  • Associates (46) $258
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (14) $159
  • 1st Year Analyst (80) $150
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (73) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
3
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
4
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
5
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
6
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
7
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
8
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
9
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
10
Mimbs's picture
Mimbs
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”