My boss hates me and is trying to fire me – how should I respond?

I am a first year Analyst working in Sales at a BB, my overall performance so far has been average (not great, but not bad). However unfortunately I have a very bad relationship with my immediate boss (VP level), from the moment I joined her team she took an instant disliking to me. During my first few months she was generally very spiteful, refused to spend time on me etc. On occasions when I made a minor mistake she would totally blow it out of all proportions, shouting at me and calling me a retard in a loud voice so half the entire trading floor could hear.

A couple of months ago another Analyst was hired to join our team, her attitude towards him is totally different. She spends a lot of time talking with him and training him. He has made many mistakes, but whenever this happens she just nicely tells him to “be more careful” without scolding him.
My method of dealing with this so far has basically been to just accept all her bullshit, act apologetic and try my best to impress her. However since last month she has been complaining to her boss (MD level) about my “poor performance”, and pushing to get me fired. Last month HR issued me a warning letter that the quality of my work is not good enough, and that failure to improve could lead to termination of employment. Many of the “problem areas” listed in the letter are greatly exaggerated, some are outright false. For example it states my work has been “full of errors”. The reality is since joining I have made substantially less errors than other Analysts in my group.

This week when glancing at her screen on two occasions I noticed her writing an email to the MD complaining about me, however on both occasions the content of her email was an outright lie. She is basically making up stories to try to get me fired. I am now considering whether to complain to the MD about her, however am obviously concerned about admitting looking at her screen. However I can’t just take no action and allow her to continue lying about me.

 
Best Response

If you are a minority, try to push for a discrimination case. If you are not, just say you are LGBT and gently ask you boss if she is treating you this way because you are gay. Also say that you feel she is treating you this way because you are gay - to her face.

Watch her recant in 3, 2, 1, now.

 
sabrina91:

If you are a minority, try to push for a discrimination case. If you are not, just say you are LGBT and gently ask you boss if she is treating you this way because you are gay. Also say that you feel she is treating you this way because you are gay - to her face.

Watch her recant in 3, 2, 1, now.

Cuthroat, but definitely one way to fix that problem. In the long run you're probably going to want to look for an exit either to another team internally or externally, since this is just problematic overall.

 
sabrina91:

If you are a minority, try to push for a discrimination case. If you are not, just say you are LGBT and gently ask you boss if she is treating you this way because you are gay. Also say that you feel she is treating you this way because you are gay - to her face.

Watch her recant in 3, 2, 1, now.

That's gold, Jerry.. Gold!

 
sabrina91:

If you are a minority, try to push for a discrimination case. If you are not, just say you are LGBT and gently ask you boss if she is treating you this way because you are gay. Also say that you feel she is treating you this way because you are gay - to her face.

Watch her recant in 3, 2, 1, now.

This is truly Machiavellian. +1

 

How long has your relationship been this way? Has she always disliked you? Regardless, saying other people make more mistakes doesn't do much when you've made fewer unless its documented. You have to make your work as mistake free as possible and document every interaction and response when you're reviewed. Ask alot of questions. This might piss her off, but at least you'll keep your job. And if its a case where you honestly feel you're being treated unfairly you have to decided if its best to try to get transferred to another dept/office to get another boss or going to the MD. Although calling you a retard is very offensive and extremely unprofessional and I would definitely see if another analyst can back you up on that.

You mentioned HR but HR generally won't help unless its blatantly obvious discrimination (racial slurs, sexist slurs, etc.) and here's why. To the organization this VP has more experience training people and knows the work product better than you. Unless they just became a VP the likelihood is that they have trained more people than you also and might not have had that problem. At my old company there were well known upper level management people that were complained about every year and were constantly a source of people leaving, swiching depts, etc. However, those people were damn good at their jobs (the part that didn't include being a team player and mentoring younger employees) and they got to keep their jobs. You being a first year, are very replaceable.

Ultimately going to an MD is your call, but depending on how far you are into your first year, if you aren't married to that firm, office, etc. I would leave around the one year mark. When people ask why, you can always spin your response into something involving fit. Just make sure you do everything you can to get an average review. Good luck and let us know how it goes!

"Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there" - Will Rogers
 

1) Leave or ask to be transferred out. 2) Reach out to an associate or other VP that you feel might be friendly. Ask them honestly how your performance has been and delicately broach the subject about the personality conflict with your VP. This might be something that has happened before.

IMO, going to the MD isn't going to do much. Your word against hers. She says your performance sucks, you'll say you make less mistakes than others. He will hear that you make mistakes and that you're probably just minimizing them. I think you're in a really shitty situation and feel for you.

 

Honestly, the LGBT idea is savage, but it'd buy you more than enough time to fund an exit. I don't think you have a future at the firm regardless of how this all gets resolved, so you should start looking for other options.

On the issue itself, she doesn't hate you for no reason. It might be a shitty, god-awful reason, but she has one. If you're a girl, are you hotter than her? Did you undermine her once at the beginning of your stint? Is there another senior member that likes you more than her? Are you a different nationality? Etc. At this point, it's probably too late to patch things up, but it could help to know what it is.

 

You can’t win a real argument, because that requires someone to accept being wrong, which is why you don’t engage in drama, because no matter how thoroughly you repudiate any allegation—the sentiment will continue to bite you in the ass. Instead of trying to defend yourself, address the issue head-on by asking for help with your performance. It’s very difficult to shit on someone who is coming to you hat-in-hand for help, especially when they are completely receptive and eager for your criticisms (actually try to do what they say). Think like Doc Rivers, the guy is a master at deflecting criticism, largely by agreeing.

 
ConPanna:

It's very difficult to shit on someone who is coming to you hat-in-hand for help

Try this, although some people are not reasonable at all. If that fails, it's been said here; document everything. Try to get reamed out in front of witnesses; especially if there are slurs being hurled your way. Get some senior people on your side. In short, make all preparations for war. And find an exit opp/strategy sharpish. Don't just lay there and take it. My $0.02

 

In these cases, it's hard to win if you're on the junior end. Transfer to another firm if you can, another department is fine too but it your reputation might cross departments if she dislikes you enough.

There's very little upside for anyone else involved to back you, and a lot of downside if they incur her wrath as well.

Also, trying going to her humbly and asking how you can improve. There's the potential chance you are handing her work that hits her pet peeves, and she may view you more favorably after this.

 

Hate to say it, but at this point if your boss has it out for you your best bet is to either transfer departments or leave the firm. It seems to me that the decision has already been made, especially if you got one of those letters.

Find someone reasonable to serve as your reference who knows the situation and is in your corner, and get that resume ready stat.

Metal. Music. Life. www.headofmetal.com
 

I always find it hard to believe that someone can instantly dislike another person to the level of trying to get them fired. My guess is that your performance is poorer than you think and you don't have the personality to make up for it.

I would start looking for another job ASAP before you do get fired. It seems even if you don't get fired your reputation is pretty much in the gutter at that firm.

 

You need to start looking for another group or job asap. The letter from HR is for one purpose only: start the paper trail to fire you or cut in the next round of layoffs. Going to the MD won't matter/ help. He's been hearing for a long time how much of a fuck up you are and you going to him won't change his mind even if the mistakes your boss alleges are greatly exaggerated or completely fictitious. The firm is going to come down on her side. I would make finding another job priority #1 even over your current role since in management's eyes you are a problem to get rid off. I've seen this play out in person. Even if you do a good job in many ways your boss's opinion of you is the firm's opinion of you. (Only exception is if you either bring in a ton of revenue or you have a LEGITIMATE threat to fuck up their shit with a lawsuit )

 

I am sorry but that letter is basically notice of termination. They are giving you a head start to try and find another job. I would say try to transfer internally but I don't think anyone will want to deal with the politics and take you on. They are just risk averse like that. The best thing to do is to find a new job. It is unfortunate that this is happening but usually people at BB's avoid drama like the plague so I wonder if her accusations have some merit.

********"Babies don't cost money, they MAKE money." - Jerri Blank********
 

Its over my friend. Start getting your ducks in order. Honestly, banks are always looking to hire sales people-- it may be a step down in name, but there is always a bid for salesmen. Reach out to some of your younger custy's, see if they know which banks may need a junior.

But then you need to REALLY evaluate why this all happened to avoid it in the future.

1.) She is a bigot who doesn't like your race/ethinicity/etc. 2.) She is threatened by your looks, for whatever reason 3.) She is threatened by your talent/background 4.) She really wanted to hire someone else during the interview process 5.) One of her friends is looking for a job, and she really wants to hire them 6.) You have a unattractive physical flaw (e.g. tick, fat, bald, short) 7.) Your attribution bias is out of wack, and your work is actually a lot WORSE than what you think

"Sounds to me like you guys a couple of bookies."
 

I've been in this exact situation. In my case though, it was warranted. I as most definitely a screw-up. You really have to evaluate why she would just hate you. There's definitely a reason behind it. Hard as it may be to swallow, it might be something about you. Be honest with yourself and it'll pay in the long term.

In any case, like others have pointed out, the letter is just a formality. The decision has already been made to fire you so I'd seriously start looking for another job before you do get the boot. It's sad, but these things happen. I hope you pull through.

Chill
 

A lot of this is luck. My first boss at a bank loved me and my second boss hated me. Luckily I found a way to be transferred to a different boss after the second one as soon as possible. He is one of those people that doesn't get along with anyone.

 

Esse incidunt aliquid vero autem quae impedit beatae. Consequuntur culpa est et assumenda debitis doloribus facilis accusamus. Repellendus earum a tenetur ex. Alias aut omnis amet enim.

Nihil cumque eum veniam inventore quidem sunt. Dolore tenetur non laudantium cum consectetur. Mollitia labore voluptas sed explicabo cupiditate debitis eaque.

 

Similique facere laudantium ipsam omnis et est. Iure et eligendi asperiores delectus ab a et.

Quia ipsum non qui pariatur id dolorem incidunt. Quibusdam sint corrupti quas et sed. Et quo aut dolor corporis. Delectus repudiandae magnam et et tempore officia excepturi reprehenderit.

Culpa fugit debitis nobis voluptas. Rem asperiores perspiciatis recusandae nihil ea placeat et ea. Autem voluptate temporibus quam cum odit consequuntur. Ut sequi eaque tenetur. Id repudiandae accusamus sit.

Career Advancement Opportunities

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company 02 99.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 19 98.8%
  • Harris Williams & Co. (++) 98.3%
  • Lazard Freres 02 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 03 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Harris Williams & Co. 18 99.4%
  • JPMorgan Chase 10 98.8%
  • Lazard Freres 05 98.3%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.7%
  • William Blair 03 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Lazard Freres 01 99.4%
  • Jefferies & Company 02 98.8%
  • Goldman Sachs 17 98.3%
  • Moelis & Company 07 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 05 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (5) $648
  • Vice President (19) $385
  • Associates (86) $261
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (13) $181
  • Intern/Summer Associate (33) $170
  • 2nd Year Analyst (66) $168
  • 1st Year Analyst (202) $159
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (144) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
3
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
99.0
4
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
5
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
6
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
7
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
kanon's picture
kanon
98.9
10
numi's picture
numi
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”