How many of you bang one night stands raw dog? Lately, as well intentioned as I am at the outset, when I'm drunk it just takes me forever to bust so I just end up hitting it raw after a while. I mean I obviously pull out... but not exactly the safest method. Any of you find yourself in the same situation?
Next question, I banged this grl a few weeks ago, also one night stand. I kept my jim hat on through fruition this time around (thank god). The grls ends up sleeping over (it was like 4 or 5 by that point anyway), in the morning, she opens up her somewhat large purse and has a full change of clothes. How fucking ridiculous is that? Do any of you girls actually do that? What do you think that says about you?
It was a combination of these two events that really made me think about what I've been doing. On one side I was glad I didn't bang said girl without a condom. On the other hand, I realized how ridiculous it is to bang any girl like that unless its a gf on birth control. And on the third hand, its just really impossible for me to bust when Im drunk and wearing a condom.
ok.
Easy solution: instead of taking the condom off, just stick it in the butt.
tmi
Best post ever. I wish I had a silver banana.
HAHA! You, sir, are a legend.
Bro I was in a similar situation- the bitch brought a toothbrush and all the amenities. Sluts these days amirite? They degrade themselves before I even get the chance
Also this isn't the best post ever nor is he a legend. These things are pretty common boys
Not in Europe ;).
I actually keep an extra toothbrush for these kinds of girls and just say that it is "new" every time :P
hahaha I did that too
Why don't you just go in the bathroom and finish. If it's a one night stand do you have to bust a nut while you're hitting the P.
Work the chocha for 5-10 minutes and once it gets old, just say hey I gotta finish up in the bathroom. Shorty might help you with a HJ, but if not who cares it's a one nighter, you still fucked her, right?
It would seem that your problem might be who you picked. She might have been a B&T and had to get back to Jersey to open the nail salon before her boss showed up at the shop.
Whatever happen to the good old days of going to breakfast and knowing every chick that got banged down last night because they were still in their dress and heels eating an omelet with messed up hair and make-up? Or catching a glimpse of them walking to the guest parking lots wearing a big ass t-shirt and high heels and an outfit in the arms? Haha, those were the days.
When I was in the Army, my buddies would get so pissed when I turned girls down that asked me to go home with them. All I could think of was that I couldn't be the first guy they asked to go home and if they were confident enough to approach me out of the blue, they must have a worn out vag.
Marcus had a good idea, but if they, for some reason, are less than receptive to that idea...ask them for a HJ or finish it up on your own. I had a similar issue with an ex and I basically had to find one position where she laid completely still and I would just go jack rabbit on her as fast as I could.
The good news it not the worse problem to have. Good luck though.
Regards
ahhh...... the good ole walk of shame at 5:30 in the morning lol
stop banging loose women
just always wear a condom. It's really not worth it.
ok, to be honese, i don't do one night stands. i might not be able to give right answers to your questions. my only advice is "BE SAFE!"
Haha you know this thread is started by a virgin because anyone "raw dogging" a chick in NYC is praying they don't have something vs bragging about this shit on WSO. Any girl who would let you hit it without protection after just meeting you is not a girl you wanna go and sleep with unprotected.
dude if this were a serious post... get tested for your sake
The OP is just amazing... Both in stupidity and humor.
-N.
Yeah, I totally stopped with the raw dogging. So not worth it, STD, preggers, etc. One time woke up after one-nighter like a few years ago, and was like WTF am I doing. This girl supposedly douched it out. Not sure, if this actually works. But I was young and trusting. I've had two tests in the past few years, thankfully both clean. Not fun and the downside is just too great for going it raw, at least for me. Whatever floats your boat.
After awhile, you kind of get used to the raincoat. Then again I've been with my current gf for 3 yrs now. My advice, get used to a raincoat and stop getting so smashed you can't finish.
To the other members who posted this is "legendary" or what not. It's not. It's pretty stupid and mildly entertaining post at best.
Enjoy the herp.
Definitely not bragging, just a bit perplexed and figured some of you have experienced the same.
Just get ultra sensitive or something.
mildly amusing thread. B+
If a chic is that low as to already be prepared for a one night stand by having a full change of clothes ready on her night out, I feel sorry for you for putting anything in her...
Tru Dat
heh. i find it funny that you guys try to be funny and cool, but youre not.
Ever had a one night stand and had to work next morning (Originally Posted: 07/06/2013)
Have you ever had a one night stand with some bimbo at your place then had to leave her to go to work early the next morning?
I imagined Mac from Always Sunny saying this,
I worked in China for a short time, and this happened on more than one occasion. Kicking her out made me feel badass for the entire day.
such a badass, bro
Does it have to be a ONS or does a steady slam count?
...and that's why you always go to her place, if you know that you are that kind of guy...
the other day went out with the team... decided to leave to blow off some steam early, met a girl at a bus stop... fooled around till 5 in the morning in her place, woke up at 7... im an ibd summer intern, need a fresh brain, not a good time the next day..
not sure if serious?
.
well that escalated quickly
Just leave Huey Lewis and the News on for the rest of the day and with any luck she'll still be there after work
didn't realize this was the 80s/90s
Just time it so you get your six hours of sleep and you should be fine.
You always go back to her place because (1) it prevents the issue of kicking her out and (2) she'll be more comfortable at her place, which means a higher likelihood of sex (if there's even a remote possibility that she might not put out)
Brah what bish goes over to a guys house with the intention of NOT having sex?
hahaha
The number of american psycho references that monkeys miss on this website continues to astound me.... seriously that move should be required viewing to get a membership here.
Really, you've never had that happen before? Usually it happens when she really likes you but isn't ready to open her legs.
What do I do? Simple, leave out a $100 bill with a note that says "Don't steal my shit."
The ONLY times where they've said no to sex was if they were on their period, but you know...the consolation wasn't so bad...
Yes, but you're assuming that you know her. There are two kinds of girl:
But you're a badass gentleman, so you'd have known to not take her home expecting to give her the business. You probably would have dispatched her like a badass [gentleman] and stayed out for the night looking for the second type of girl...
So you see, if a girl is at your house and not putting out, it's you who have made a mistake by miscategorizing her.
DSP understands full well. This badass gentleman knows which girls are 1s and which are 2s.
I wasn't assuming the girl was previously known to me, I was assuming you had the skills to get her to like you enough in a short amount of time to get her home. It doesn't always mean she wants to jump your bone, a decent amount of girls just want to fool around.
I'd like to know what girl goes to the home of a man she just met after a night of alcohol and partying thinking that he wants to play Monopoly.
i kno that feeling freakin misty only has two starfish at the pool, so indecent
"Monopoly" or Monopoly?
Dis. They only go back for the bedroom acrobatics.
Like I said, some girls just want to fool around. And/or my game isn't tight enough, though it's pretty damn close to perfect...
Just make sure that she's not Mormon. If she is you are probably going to have a bad time.
At this point, I've been living in NYC for a grad total of ~4 years. Now in that time, I've slayed a few girls, in total 22 (I've kept track, it's not an amazing number no doubt, but every girl I slept with was quality. Few crazy girls, all good looking, all interesting, and no one night stands).
Out of these 22, a grad total of 1 was met the night we slept together. 1. Your game isn't the issue, it's your strategy. Read on.
Now, that's not to say that I only met a girl once and tried to take her home that night. But what I figured out pretty early on is that you aren't taking any girl home worth taking home (read: not whores who you will catch shit from) in this city the night you meet her. Realistically, the number of girls I got home the night of meeting them was probably about 10, and out of those like I said, 1 actually slept with me. 1/10 is pretty bad odds.
So where did the other 21 come from? Girlfriends? Nope.
What my buddies and other men seem to not realize is that you need to build rapport with a girl before trying to get with her. For example:
Meet a girl in line at the bodega where you get your 2-eggs-on-a-bagel in the morning and say hello, offer her your number and meet for a drink. After said drink, pay and DO NOT TRY TO TAKE HER HOME. This will 1) confuse her (does he not like me) 2) put you in the power seat. next, text her a week later and do the same thing. Now she's wondering why you're not making a move. You truly have the upper hand now, Third, text her and tell her you're meeting some buddies for drinks Friday, or tell her you're partying, whatever. What are her plans? She'll tell you, but don't respond. Wait til about midnight and ask if she'd like to meet. She will, and now you can definitely hit a home run.
If you're truly just looking for one night stands the above isn't applicable, but realize that you're going to have a very low kill percentage playing that game. I've got one good friend who's a beast by everyone's standards, and I'm guessing he's about at my number after 3 years, so he's doing 33% better, but he's gone home with many many more girls and done nothing but made out and cuddled on the vast majority of occasions. He's also caught syphilis twice and caught a fungal infection. Pretty gross. He also spends copious amounts of money on drinks for girls. I don't. I'll also say the girl's I've pulled are a lot hotter. They're also in general just cooler girls (as you can pre screen) so I'm still in contact with quite a few of them, and friends with one or two. So with that said the choice is yours.
excellent friendzone advice rite here +1
LOL
In all seriousness, there's too much beta in this thread. Just end it before it gets out of hand.
My strategy is solid, thanks for the write up though
Of course. I was mostly just trying to say that life isn't a Van Wilder movie and even with the tightest game, no one is bagging tons of girls for one night stands unless their standards are just deplorable.
says the guy who posts as a 'pokeman'.
I know some guys that pull ONS on the reg, but they're crazy charismatic. I'm not naturally that good, but my game is tight enough for me.
mudkipz is awesome :)
This strategy will work for vast majority of dudes assuming you have the social skills to pull it off.
One Night Stand Analysis-- No BS (Originally Posted: 02/28/2010)
Ok here's the question, after being teased by OilPrices last week....
Are you more inclined to follow-up with a female from a one-night-stand (and possibly make it a 2+ night thing) if:
A: The sex is incredible OR B: You actually conversate with her, whereafter you learn she's got an awesome job AND her family is LOADED (like Ultra-HNW loaded).
A and B are mutually exclusive.
Which one are you more likely to call again? (Assume that BOTH is NOT an acceptable answer.)
This is relevant to my interests
A
b/c B would mean the sex was not incredible given your mutually exclusive criteria. you can't put your dick in her family's money or her job and who cares if you got your own porche parked in the driveway
A
B if I was a loser (still would look for women on the side who satisfied the A) criteria)
people who say 'conversate' are fucking stupid.
I'm glad I could provide you with a target for you mis-directed aggression, to make you feel better about yourself this evening. What's wrong, need a hug little fella?
Excellent! That's what I was looking for! Keep it coming...
Wow...PJC coming out with a reasoned analysis that I can completely agree with.
+1 for A.
A,
cause if B, you would just end up cheating if it turned into a relationship, and cheating is bad.
You guys are all a bunch of hedonists.
B.
B, he never said the sex was bad, it just isn't incredible.
As I review questions for a phone interview today, I think of :
"Tell me about a time when you faced adversity in the bedroom with a fellow banker. How did you show leadership in that situation?"
B
B because it's more rare and makes for a more interesting story
B. divorce after long enough to get 50% of the family fortune from divorce. who said men couldn't be gold-diggers? i'd just view the lost time in the relationship as equivalent to years sacrificed for career (mba, analyst stint...) at least instead of working and kissing some asshole boss's ass you get to do the same with a chick who lets you into her undies :) and you kiss ass in a kingsize bed.
^son, this is a one night stand, you're thinking of divorcing her? who's to say she has the family fortune, maybe she just siphons some money off occasionally.
There are very relevant dynamics that factor into the decision making process here:
Is sex with A better than sex with B because A is better looking? (or) Are they equal in appearance? (This is surprisingly important)
Is sex with A better because she will either (a) make me breakfast the next day or (b) left IMMEDIATELY after the sex?
Is sex with B worse because she will burn my toast in the morning?
Will A make me a sandwich?
Is sex with A better OR sex with B worse because one of them is the girlfriend/wife of a friend/co-worker/boss/enemy/Christian Bale?
These are key questions that I can't believe nobody is asking.
rebelcross-- these are, indeed, very relevant questions, and I will ponder them over dinner tonight.
I can tell you right now, though:
A will get up and leave immediately, but she WILL ask you for cab fare
B will get up and bring you a warm wash cloth, and then make you a grilled cheese sandwich before leaving. She may or may not ask for cab fare.
good point pjc, but with me a one-night stand always develops into a relationship (if i don't dump the girl - i'm THAT good)
@rebelcross - guessing we assume ceteris paribus (love saying that...)
B more girls give incredible sex than girls with an awesome job and wealthy family. haha
The question does not matter - you've got blue balls. Do either one. Just be gentle with B - you have more to lose.
If they are only one night stands, and marrying the girl with the job/family fortune is out of the question, then who gives a f*ck about the job/fortune.
one night stand = A: Great sex, B: bad sex.......
A.
B You might get some nice connections/perks
@rebel though i like your take on the theme park mogul and the literary finesse with which you described that scenario, you must either be a virgin or you cant hold on in bed for more than a few seconds. the girl DEFINITELY makes a difference when all else is taken out of the equation. moving around... god! if she know how. touching you in all kinds of places, talking dirty, doing it RIGHT (not sounding like a cheap porn actress), moaning and shouting and clawing your back... i think this is getting a little graphic now for the forum but you get my drift? you can have that or have a cold fish just lying there under you, maybe not even wet. crap, i just thought of something: are you a necrophiliac???
Dagro I'm going to have to respectfully disagree 100,000%.
Sure I know the cool thing going around is to say that one girl is more talented than the other, that's the cliche' anyway...
But the bottom line is, that sex is a man's game - and once you get past the Mickey Mouse frat boy days, you realize that no girl knows how to f*ck the way a real man does.
So when I'm in there, I know what I want, and I know how to take it, and there ain't a DAMN thing she can do to make it better except put on more make-up and invite over her girlfriends.
Call it personal preference, if you still want her to scratch your back...that's your own business, not my style.
Heh... This is how I read your post and it made me laugh a little bit. Ah, good ol' immaturity...
That's my credo: "Pu&% isn't inherently good, I make Pu&% good! ...that should be my WSO signature.
i guess it's all about taste then. i still hold that there's lots to be gained from tangoing than from leading a rag doll.
Golden.
keep it comin' kids. no puns intended.
Additional questions:
Also, I'd like to know whether you think its possible to somehow profit (monetarily, for your network, or otherwise) by choosing B. Has anyone (such as a Private Banker, Asset Gatherer, even HF) ever landed a client that they learned about by having a one-night-stand with the client's daughter?
but i am le-tired
We all know the real answer; A, until she kicks your ass to the curb
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