How to renege

I’m a graduating senior in college and I’ve been working for a small-mid size hf since fall. I knew the pm said there’s a possibility that he might take me as a full time, but it wasn’t set on stone and I was happy to go back to the bank I interned my junior summer.

He called me into his office on Friday afternoon, and asked if I’d be interested in joining the fund. I knew this is something I saw as an end goal, and stupid not to take. At the same time, I feel bad for people who were only nice to me during my summer internship. But acknowledging that the offer from hf is far better for me, I’ll have to make a move.

Can you guys share how i should do this? Like should I call HR, a junior I worked with, senior MD who went to my school. I just have to idea where to start… Would really appreciate a word of advice. Thank you.

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I used to think that reneging was a big deal and end-of-the-world type of thing, but after being on the other side of the table both at a bank (used to be the analyst staffer and heavily involved with the recruiting process) and now at a HF, I can honestly say that it's not a big deal. It happens all of the time.

I would just tell the bank that, after a lot of thought, you had a change of heart and have decided that you would like to pursue something else as a career and are still figuring it out. Apologize for the inconvenience that it caused. No reason to give them specifics.

Banks usually over-react, will guilt trip you, and might even have some senior person reach out to tell you that you are making a huge mistake. But that's about it. There are also always some horror story of some vindictive associate or junior VP who takes it up on himself to reach out to their personal network to bad mouth the candidate, but that is definitely not the bank asking them to do that. Usually, after a couple of days, nobody even cares. And by the time everyone starts in the Fall, nobody even remembers your name. That's how it always goes. It will be fine.

 

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