Does anyone have any thoughts on bro culture in the office?
How does one who is not part of this subculture adjust?
For context, my parents were immigrants and I’ve always been more intellectual / scholarly in school and therefore do not fit in with the bro culture super well.
I love meeting new people in the office and saying hi, but there are some people in the office, analyst even, who ignore others who are not part of the bro culture. Even though we are coworkers, they won’t even reciprocate a head nod when sharing an elevator. Or at a company happy hour, they can talk amongst each other for minutes and minutes without acknowledging that someone is trying to join the conversation — no eye contact, no greeting at all.
Do these individuals think they are better than those not part of their group — that these “others” are not worth talking to or even acknowledging? I hope this is not the case, but sometimes I can’t help but think this is the case.
And if this is the case, what can one do about it? Thank you all.
>For context, my parents were immigrants and I've always been more intellectual / scholarly in school and therefore do not fit in with the bro culture super well.
This is a cop out, I definitely fall under bro culture a bit (at least the clock app white women would say so) and I read about the Enlightenment, Sylvia Plath and read about world history in my free time. I also know like 10 other dudes like this, so uhhhh idk bout that one. Also I'll do you one better, not just my parents were immigrants, but I myself am an immigrant lol, so this is a faulty excuse.
Thanks — sounds like you’d be really cool to get to know. I’m not trying to “cop out”.
Just trying to figure out a path forward. Is this just in my head?
It might just be cultural bro, I def get what you mean cause in the office sometimes there are people that "out-bro" me so I'll just step away. It's honestly not a great culture and I rather hang out more with people like myself, but the best thing is to just not get involved unless your career is at stake or something, in that case you just kind of have to play pretend. I don't watch any sports for example, so anytime the guys in the office ask me about "the game" I just say "man that's crazy, can't believe [team that won] won, but [team that lost] really looked like they were gonna win in the first half" or something generic. The day after some huge sporting event I just memorize a few names and drop them in convo's and I come out fine. Obviously some sportsball hardo might detect I didn't really watch it, but most people are cool with me. Just play it moderately, but remember, do you really want to be at a party you weren't invited to?
By looking at them as apart of a larger “bro” subculture, you’re already making an in group out group thing for yourself, and you’re probably backlogging some experiences you’ve had with the classic “nerds” vs “bros” horse shit.
Play nice. You’re on the same side. Mimic some of their behaviors in a way that feels authentic to you. If you come off like a know-it-all type, they probably won’t trust you. If you lean in too much, you will come off as desperate.
Just be a homie lol.
>real estate professional
sigh, bruh y'all not bankers and don't get it, go back to checking Zestimates or somethin idk
This is a 10/10 comment and as someone in RE (I make more money than you though, analyst scum) this was hilarious
I love my banker friends, but I’ll take K1s over W2s for as long as I can.
just be normal
lmao if they actually do this to you never talk to them again and fuck with them any opportunity you have (ensuring no or minimal repercussions)
i bet this is citi. citi definitely is the type of place to have assholes like you described.
No.
Might I add, I absolutely detest sports talk. And for the record I am definitely a "bro." I'm also an intellectual and a patriot. I find it so childish to wrap your mind into a trivial game. I honestly just don't understand it. And I played sports my whole life - travel basketball, football, baseball, lacrosse (all at different points in my childhood through teenage years, some at different parts of the year ofcourse). Playing sports? Love it. Still fun to this day. Watching others play? Who cares. Unless you have money on the outcome, another silly thing men like to engage in. Is it going to solve the U.S. debt problem? Is it going to help broker relations in the Middle East? What the fuck does some baseball game matter? Oh Yankees vs. Boston, let's drink and go find the first Boston fan in New York and tell him to get the fuck outta our city. This shit is ridiculous. I cannot with a straight face wrap my emotion into sports. The best part about it all is the bravado that follows in the conversations about the game the next day. Guys will literally stick their chest out and talk with pride that they somehow "knew" player X was going to perform like that against player Y and that they called it. It's the same shit over and over again. Best part is, 99% of the time these guys are speaking from either repeated things they've heard or just making shit up on the fly. There are no statistical profiles being created with expected levels of output for the players, there's no scenario analysis of the game overall, there's nothing. Now, there are gamblers that do in fact build models on players and matchups. That's now a thing and apparently some guys are good at it. Those are the guys I'd like to speak to, because there's substance there. But fuckin Joe who bangs his chest at happy hour and talks about his packers, I'll pass. Fuck sports talk
*Edit: Sports talk can be used as a bridge for connection between people which is great but there seems to be a societal pull on all of us to devolve our emotions into the game. Some of us are very emotionally involved in our teams which is fine but there seems to be a general air of pressure in our society to be as emotionally involved as others. It is that disingenuous character that sometimes airs itself in a social circle that I detest. I love sports. I dislike the social conformity that surrounds the entertainment of such.
Counter opinion. One of the main reasons why I'm interested in professional sports is because it's probably the closest thing we have in our society to a perfect meritocracy. No matter how many connections an NFL QB has, no matter how prestigious his upbringing was, if he doesn't perform and put up good numbers, he's gone. And just think about how many NBA/NFL players came from inner city poverty only to succeed at their craft through sheer hard work and dedication. The % of pro athletes that come from these kinds of upbringings is much higher than the % of these kinds of people you see in other high paying professions (bankers, law firm partners, Hollywood actors, etc.)
Also, as you mentioned, betting is pretty fun and you can develop cool strategies and models just like with trading.
no bitches?
Where did you get the idea that bros aren't intellectual? Do you know what kind of cerebral autist it takes to accomplish some of the shit we're into?