Cold feet and dread
As the commencement date of my FT BB IB role ticks closer, I find myself dreading the loss of freedom that would soon ensue. I first went into IB expecting 80 hours, with some all-nighters spaced inbetween. The reality seems to be at around 110 hours consecutively, week after weary week (i.e. working til 4am everyday even on weekends). After fighting tooth and nail to land a conversion, I am now experiencing severe cold feet, with none of the bright eyed bushy tailed excitement I used to have.
There was once when I was enamored with the glamour of IB but it is no more. Software engineers are paid the same if not higher (with 10x my signing bonus) with humane/flexi hours of 9am - 5.30pm. Despite how competitive it was to land the summer internship, we are ultimately not paid for our brains, but our ability to trudge through 110 hours a week in an environment where everyone is sleep deprived and has no chill.
It seems there's no worser time to be disillusioned, I'm about to begin an exciting career in a highly coveted role and yet I dread the day it starts. Has anyone felt the same way? What kept you going?
Cocaine, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and Pornhub
I would just recruit aggressively for the buyside on-cycle. The process is so early it nowadays it will probably be done by the time you have barely hit the desk from training.
With your offer in hand, you can afford to spend the next 2 years doing the absolute bare minimum and coasting (not like you're going to learn anything of serious incremental value making that 99th profile). You'll be in a much stronger negotiating position to pushback against shitty staffings and other bullshit thrown your way, and its not like your after-tax bonus will be materially different anyway. I think most other rational people would gladly trade a few extra thousand in after-tax bonus money for an extra 10 to 20 hours not spent working.
I know what I have just described is not the most politically correct action plan, and anyone who is an associate and up is probably shuddering reading this, but that's how the game works. Not my fault people decided to setup a system with misaligned incentive structures.
Sorry dude, this feels like it’s spoken by someone who doesn’t know what they’re really saying and certainly doesn’t have the longitudinal benefit of understanding what exactly they’re suggesting.
Sure you can slack off after securing your exit but you’re also less likely to get good staffings which means you’ll learn less and then when you hit the desk at TPG/Advent/Silverlake/etc you’re at a disadvantage to the EVR/PJT analyst that grinded their ass off and has twice as many reps as you. In banking, it’s not a huge liability but in PE, when you’re likely competing for a promotion, you need that experience so that you can provide as much value as you can from day one and prove why you should be a VP vs someone who has an otherwise identical resume to you.
I mean if you’re fine doing the target >> IB >> MF/MM PE >> HSW grind because that’s as prestigious as it gets then feel free to dick around after locking up an offer but if you want to build your career then I suggest you view your time in IB as an opportunity to learn as much as possible in the time you have. This is the time to hone your skills and soak up as much as you can because rest assured, there’s at least one other person in your class at your PE fund that put their head down and helped create a huge advantage for themselves.
I get the argument you're trying to make, but there are several flawed assumptions. The number of reps point is kinda bullshit, you're really telling me you're going to be sooo much better at building LBOs (off a template, no less) or managing administrative process work because you took on that fourth extra sellside staffing as a banking analyst? Also if reps are so important, why do banking analysts regularly leave a year early to start their jobs at KKR, TPG or elite HFs like Coatue, Melvin etc... (those are all real examples)
Additionally, there is usually minimal correlation between who is a good analyst and who gets the "good staffings". It usually just comes down to who has capacity at the time, and usually the studs are going to be staffed to the brim anyway, so when a new megadeal comes thru the pipeline they are forced to give it to someone random. At my firm, the people who were staffed on / closed the $10bn+ M&A deals ranged from the studs of the class to literally the worst analysts in the entire class.
To your point about once you hit PE, 70%+ of most well-known PE funds across this forum are going to kick you out after 2 years as an associate anyway, no matter how much of a stud you are. Sure, if you're at one of the 20 to 25% where they are willing to promote internally, with or without a MBA, you should obviously grind (assuming you even want to stay in finance long-term), but note I was only speaking about banking in my prior post anyway.
Also I am not exactly speaking out of my ass, I can name at least four people I know personally just off the top of my head, who are now doing perfectly fine at Apollo/Bain Cap/Blackstone/Warburg Pincus, that basically did what I described in my prior post.
To be honest, it takes maturity to realize that the hyped job isn't the one you want. I was in a similar position as you but for IB internship vs trading and ultimately chose trading because of the lifestyle. That being said, IB is great start even if you are unhappy and can open doors that are better for you.
Feeling the same way man. Let me know if you figure it out.
Just the other day I was reading about the best way to quit, and I remembered I hadn’t even started FT. Pretty depressing. In the meantime I’m trying to be in the moment with these last few months of school and appreciate my life being pretty much exactly the way I’d like it.
Also, don’t watch Fight Club or read Nietzsche. I’ve done both recently and they’ve made me even more disillusioned.
You’re going to average 75-85 hours a week. Become good at your job and it will probably be a little less than that.
Do your time. Make connections. Work hard. You’ll have every opportunity in the world to pivot careers after doing your two years
I think perhaps the strenuous summer hours were more of a test (as well as some happenstance). Look at the experience as a great opportunity to have learned some basics so hopefully once FT you will be more efficient. Maybe you can plan certain things now to set yourself up so you're very efficient at the office, now that you know some of the apps used, staff you'll be working with, processes. Set yourself up as needed at home - maybe you need some household help/laundry/dry cleaning delivered/groceries delivered. You'll find ways to stay connected to friends even if they can't see you often. You'll become super efficient. Maybe your hours won't be as bad as you think, and remember, this is not a prison sentence. You do not have to stay. Take it one day at a time rather than getting worked up in advance. Start studying for the FINRA exams now. Plan a fun vacation prior to your start, talk to friends and let them know you'll have a scary year or two and to please be patient/nonjudgmental, and check that you're still breathing. Don't spend too much time evaluating the waste of time/effort in doing the nth pitch book - it's just part of the process - stay positive.
And there are YouTubers / Instagram models making more than Tech people working 0 hours per week... your point is? Life isn't just about sitting on your ass and doing nothing, and that's not a realistic career plan for the vast majority of people anyway. We're in a tough world and most people need to prepare for reality instead of looking at someone else for a psychological benchmark. If you can't code but you like numbers, finance is a perfectly excellent career option.