Critique my why Corporate Banking answer

Hey guys, I'm trying to come up with a good why corporate banking answer, and I'm not sure if what I have is good, corporate banking advice often gets lost in the shadow of its big brother. 

"I'm drawn to corporate banking for a few reasons; firstly, I'm rather fond of the interpersonal aspect of the role. In corporate banking, I'd be working with clients on a long-term basis, for a number of years, this sounds far more appealing than other corporate roles which have a more transactional nature, as in one-off deals and then 'sayonara'. As a result of the habitual engagement, I would imagine that I'd become quite familiar or friends with clients over time, and I certainly feel that being able to see your friends at work is quite an effective motivator, or incentive. Simply put, I feel like it's very feasible to cultivate a community at in corporate banking, therefore I see it as a lifetime career, which is far more appealing to me than other career paths which are not so sustainable.

In addition, I'm also a fan of the breadth of products that corporate bankers work with. Corporate bankers deal with, just to name a few,  credit Facilities, working capital solutions, treasury & cash management, trade finance and various others. Yet again, this makes corporate banking stand out to me as careers in finance tend to be quite specialised or restricted in scope, thus corporate banking offering such a varied day to day life earns it a lot of brownie points."

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I am not a fan, it sounds to cliché and has no real substance. You can say that CB as opposed to IB is a more long term growth opportunity to attract clients which will open the door to potential other business lines - but do not say its more 'sayonara'. Also, regarding companies they are not your 'friends' if another bank offers them better products or services, even fewer bps they will most certainty move - so I don't like that idea also because in reading this it came across that you want a more playful environment.  

 

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