Dating in Investment Banking
Okay, so I'm in college and have a gf. I am gonna be an analyst at a higher tier BB in their IBD. Of course I am excited and thankful, but I'm wondering about dating in IB. Ik there have been posts on this already, but was wondering how it would be if my gf is in the same city and she is most likely going to be doing management consulting (not guarantee, bc she is into a lot of things) in the same city. We have been together for 2+ years and she understands the rigor of banking bc she's been in the business community all throughout college as well.
I was wondering if y'all could give me a more detailed day or week in the life to get an accurate picture of what relationship might look like. We are both pretty independent when we need to be, and this is someone I can see myself with long term. Any advice would be very much appreciated. thanks community!
You'll be fine. You'll see her in passing every morning and night most likely but you won't really be together for long periods of time at all until the weekends.
A banker dating someone in banking. Realistically, you will see each other once during the week for a couple hours when you both don't have too late of a night (I.E. get out around 10 P.M.). Weekends you can spend the whole time together except for Sundays when you work
Given, there are a couple weeks you won't see each other during the week and there are also weeks you both get out 8 P.M. every day. Very manageable if you live closer to each other in that city.
What are your thoughts on this?
Don’t.
I wouldn't. Frankly a lot of the times after a stressful day you just want 15-30 minutes to yourself before bed.
Lol when I was a SA last year, had a 1st year analyst on my team and during my 10 weeks, I saw the gradual decline of the quality of his relationship (based on his stories, demeanour, and amount of cancelled dinners) due to the intensity of the deal and the hardass VP
it was pretty sad to see but i personally always thought it was inevitable, hope they're doing better now and wish you the best
makes sense
Yea there was a number of pretty recurring things that would come up when we were talking after work and what not, but undoubtably the most notable issue was his unpredictable schedule and work intensity. I remember if we were working after 8/9 pm he would have to step out to take a call / or call his gf apologizing about cancelling dinner or not being able to meet that night. The unpredictability of the schedule was really an issue, so if they did spend time together on weekdays, but something came up, he would have to work on it and they get in a fight, etc. But because of his schedule, he rarely saw her on weekdays anyways
Also regarding the intensity of work, he spent a couple of weeks working till 2-3 am every night, and some weekends too (pretty insane). i can still picture the difference of his face in the first week vs in the 8th week of my internship. i imagine the the project was really burning him out so I think that the stress of work itself made it hard when they spent time on weekends.
I personally think the biggest issue with IB and dating pertains to its explosive schedule, when you set up a date/promise to spend time and get their hopes up, only to cancel because of a last minute thing, and this happens over and over again - there's only so much the other person can take, especially if they don't understand the industry.
But for you, she happens to understand the life of banking, so it may be much more optimistic in your case - but nonetheless congrats on the job and good luck!
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